What if someone somewhere had the technology to go back or forward in the timeline and change a thing or two? Impossible right? Well, maybe or maybe not. God would be able to do this. We would call it a miracle. If humans did it, we would say it must be trickery. Is it?
Some of you may have grown up with children's books about the Berenstein Bears. I know I could have sworn that I did. The current truth about that though, is that I did not. Those books were about the Berenstain Bears. Yes, that's right.
So what is it that causes this kind of delusion (Mandela Effect)? I know a number of you are asking the same question right now and many of you are insisting, as I did, that it was always the Berenstein Bears. Is it faulty memory? Is it a building of an improper pronunciation into the current culture? Or is it possible that at one time it WAS the Berenstein Bears and that someone changed it, maybe as an experiment, to see what we could accept in terms of changes in what we think we know. Something called trans-temporal quantum editing - the ability to go to a certain place in time and change something so that what was was once thought as a truth becomes a falsity. Interesting no?
Another more serious version of this is Biblical in its proportions. Have you ever compared the 1611 Authorized King James Version of the Bible to the NIV, NEB or NASB? There is some serious departures from what was known as truth then and what we call truth today. If you don't think so, take this test on what you think you know about the KJV. I grew up on the KJV and I was shocked by how I had been influenced by more modern translations. There was nothing that changed ultimate salvific truth, but much that had changed with certain understandings. Bottles and wine skins are two very different things. Shoes and sandals are both footwear, but what was worn in Jesus' day? Is Jeremiah a prophet or is it Jeremie? It's all very weird.
Words mean things. Truth is always supposed to be truth, no matter how minor the truth. Yet words evolve in culture. They are used by authorities to persuade, be they politicians, pastors or public administrators. And we listen to them all. Our reality and our truth is formed by our perceptions of what these people say about whatever is being discussed. They are all word wizards, casting spells to influence, guide, manipulate and create what we perceive as reality. We have to be careful...really, we do.
That's why when I try to remember things that happened in my childhood, I also need to question myself. Is this what I remember or is it something someone told me happened,or worse, is it something that I believe happened that never happened at all.
I have very clear memories of my childhood from age two onward. I remember when I had my tonsillectomy, being abused by nuns at the local Catholic hospital, even waking in the middle of the night in the children's ward where another inmate got me a glass of water. I remember coming home after and having an out of body experience, watching myself enter the kitchen of our small house in Bondurant, Iowa from near ceiling level.
I wonder how much of this is real memory. I question it, but it has the ring of truth. And as I delve deeper, trying to figure out where things went wrong with me, I question my life events even more. There are things that I do not want to be true, but I am certain are true. It makes me weep for what could have been and I want very deeply that reality that would make "now" so much more palatable.
If I could just change the timeline and accept a new old reality, my life would be different...I think...I guess. But maybe it was The Berenstain Bears all along.
Saturday, December 29, 2018
Friday, December 28, 2018
Internalized Homophobia
Over the past few weeks I have had much time for reflection. I am not liking what I have found. It is jarring...for me. I think it's because I refused to believe it was possible. How can a man be a Republican and not vote Republican? It seems a bit silly right? Why identify with a group that you really don't like? I'm not saying that's the case for me politically, but maybe you can see where I'm, going with this.
How can a man be gay and dislike other gay men? How can someone out of the closet for more than three years find himself repulsed by others of his kind?
This is where I'm at today. I really don't like homosexuals. I do not like effeminate men. I don't like their nasal voices whining at each other like someone cut off their balls. I just think they need a good slap and orders from someone to just stop it. I mean, can't they see how silly they look and sound?
Right?
Now some of you are right there with me on this and maybe some of you are thinking that I'm a hater. That last one is probably the correct one. What does this say about me as a Christian, a gay man and a human being? My internal homophobia sets up a cognitive dissonance in me that I cannot seem to get passed. I have tried to beat this. I came out of the closet. I joined a Facebook group of Christian, gay, celibate men...some of them are even married to women and have children. One might reasonably think that I would have managed to get passed the homophobia by now, but no. I hate when men touch me, even straight men. I hate being bent like this and I find I hate myself when I think about. I may need to back away from that table for awhile.
It could be that I am just sick of talking about it and reading or listening to what others have to say about it. But I think it goes deeper than that.
So...I am going to have to distance myself even further from some of my new friends at Yobbers in an effort to work this out. Guys, I don't think you can help me with this and I don't want to hurt you in the process. I will just step away until I can get a better bead on it. And no, I do not think I am the epitome of masculinity. I know I'm not. I just can't get past wishing that I was and hating what I am...How this will actually change is any one's guess.
How can a man be gay and dislike other gay men? How can someone out of the closet for more than three years find himself repulsed by others of his kind?
This is where I'm at today. I really don't like homosexuals. I do not like effeminate men. I don't like their nasal voices whining at each other like someone cut off their balls. I just think they need a good slap and orders from someone to just stop it. I mean, can't they see how silly they look and sound?
Right?
Now some of you are right there with me on this and maybe some of you are thinking that I'm a hater. That last one is probably the correct one. What does this say about me as a Christian, a gay man and a human being? My internal homophobia sets up a cognitive dissonance in me that I cannot seem to get passed. I have tried to beat this. I came out of the closet. I joined a Facebook group of Christian, gay, celibate men...some of them are even married to women and have children. One might reasonably think that I would have managed to get passed the homophobia by now, but no. I hate when men touch me, even straight men. I hate being bent like this and I find I hate myself when I think about. I may need to back away from that table for awhile.
It could be that I am just sick of talking about it and reading or listening to what others have to say about it. But I think it goes deeper than that.
So...I am going to have to distance myself even further from some of my new friends at Yobbers in an effort to work this out. Guys, I don't think you can help me with this and I don't want to hurt you in the process. I will just step away until I can get a better bead on it. And no, I do not think I am the epitome of masculinity. I know I'm not. I just can't get past wishing that I was and hating what I am...How this will actually change is any one's guess.
Friday, November 23, 2018
Boy Erased
When someone remodels a house, trying to turn it into a home, sometimes major repairs are desired to make it livable again. A supporting wall might need to be replaced if the house is to be made safe for occupancy. But you can't just tear out that supporting wall without making sure that what it supports is properly safeguarded against collapse. The house will come down around your ears, on your head and may kill you.
With a house this is possible if done properly. But can it be done with the human mind? Why would I ask that?
The book, "Boy Erased" by Garrard Conley is the true story of the gay son of a Baptist minister and his experience with conversion therapy. Conversion therapy, known in some circles as reparative therapy or even ex-gay therapy has been used in its many different forms to attempt to turn homosexual men and women to heterosexuality. The book is Garrard's personal memoir; his story in dealing with family, church and the therapy in 2004. It is very painful to read and even more traumatic if you have had a similar experience. Nevertheless, I find myself recommending the book.
Though the writer becomes somewhat resentful of Christians, I think he is very fair to the faith and to his parents. Unlike the film of the same name, this is not a screed of anti-evangelical venom. It is one man trying to understand what happened to him as he came of age and was forced to deal with his homosexuality.
In summary, Garrard knew from an early age what his desires were. He tried very hard to deny these desires. He had a girlfriend in high school. But that all fell apart as he was preparing for college. When he started his freshman year, he made a few friends.One of them was a young man named David that was studying to be a youth minister. David took Garrard under his wing, took him to church and even worked out with him. Then one day when they were alone together in his dorm room, David raped him. Following the assault, David began crying and confessed to having done the same to a 14 year old boy at his church. After this, things began to fall apart for Garrard in a most severe way. Fearing exposure as a rapist and pedophile, David called Garrard's parents posing as a college counselor and told them their son was gay.
After considerable discussion about the phone call with his parents, Garrard finally came out to them. It was devastating for his parents. He was their only child. His mother had miscarried an older sibling in the 3rd trimester of her first pregnancy. Adding to the pain, Garrard's father was about to be ordained as a pastor in the Missionary Baptist church after years of owning a car dealership. It was the perfect storm. His father sought the advice of other pastors and it was concluded that the best course of action would be a Christian conversion therapy group called Love In Action located in Memphis, TN. And that is where the real story is and also in how it all played out.
You need to read the book. Suffice it to say that, in most circles, Conversion therapy has been discredited. Exodus International, which was the umbrella organization for many of these groups, was also over Love In Action. Exodus disbanded not long after the events in this book and so did Love In Action. There was almost no success in what they were trying to do. Even the group members that managed to marry say that they never completely lost their same sex attractions. And I think the problem with all these groups lies in there approach to the whole issue.
It is assumed by these groups that people with same sex attraction were somehow damaged by parents and family psychologically. Participants are urged to map out the sin in there families and how their parents treated them. Did you receive enough attention from Dad? Did he touch you and show you love. Was Mom overbearing? How did Grandpa's alcoholism effect your Dad and how he treated you?
Really! My thought here is that if bad parenting and family moral issues were the cause of homosexuality, half the world would be gay. That's just not the case.
Then there is the constant taking of moral inventory. Confession of every sex related sin, asking for forgiveness and trying to pray the gay away. In the program portrayed in this book, John Smid, the facilitator was constantly pushing the participants for these things. Frankly, when you're 18 or 19 and you're a Christian living in the southern US, you don't have all that much sexual experience to confess to. The whole process is filled with shaming and blaming and can do severe damage to a young psyche. Some participants were even making up stories so they had something to confess.
And you cannot treat same sex desire with a 12 step program. It is not an addiction like alcoholism, drug abuse or gambling. Becoming addicted to these things comes from experience. One would never know they were prone to alcoholism until they started drinking. One does not have to participate in homosexuality to know they are gay. Is straight sex required to learn of one's heterosexuality? No, of course not.
All of these things contributed to the demise of Ex-Gay therapy. There is more, but this is the worst of it. Though Exodus and LIA are out of the business, there are still groups, both religious and secular attempting to fix homosexuals. The practice has been made illegal in some states for minors and that is because well meaning parents were forcing their children against their will to participate in these programs. In my opinion, no one should be forced into these programs against their will. It should be strictly voluntary and for those 18 and older.
One more thing of note. John Smid, the founder of LIA is today living with his husband in Paris, Texas. After two failed marriages to women, he finally gave up his own battle with SSA and moved on. Similar things happened at Exodus. John Paulk, Exodus board member and Ex-gay poster boy, divorced his Ex-lesbian wife and took a husband too. Alan Chambers, the chairman of Exodus, remains married to his wife, but says he still has same sex attractions.
I hope you get what I'm saying here. Conversion therapy does not work. It just creates a bigger messes and can ruin lives and even cause suicides. My advice? Stay away from it.
I have some limited experience with this kind of therapy. Mine was not as intensive and 8 hours daily, but I did it for a year and guess what? I'm still gay.
Read the book and see what you think.
With a house this is possible if done properly. But can it be done with the human mind? Why would I ask that?
The book, "Boy Erased" by Garrard Conley is the true story of the gay son of a Baptist minister and his experience with conversion therapy. Conversion therapy, known in some circles as reparative therapy or even ex-gay therapy has been used in its many different forms to attempt to turn homosexual men and women to heterosexuality. The book is Garrard's personal memoir; his story in dealing with family, church and the therapy in 2004. It is very painful to read and even more traumatic if you have had a similar experience. Nevertheless, I find myself recommending the book.
Though the writer becomes somewhat resentful of Christians, I think he is very fair to the faith and to his parents. Unlike the film of the same name, this is not a screed of anti-evangelical venom. It is one man trying to understand what happened to him as he came of age and was forced to deal with his homosexuality.
In summary, Garrard knew from an early age what his desires were. He tried very hard to deny these desires. He had a girlfriend in high school. But that all fell apart as he was preparing for college. When he started his freshman year, he made a few friends.One of them was a young man named David that was studying to be a youth minister. David took Garrard under his wing, took him to church and even worked out with him. Then one day when they were alone together in his dorm room, David raped him. Following the assault, David began crying and confessed to having done the same to a 14 year old boy at his church. After this, things began to fall apart for Garrard in a most severe way. Fearing exposure as a rapist and pedophile, David called Garrard's parents posing as a college counselor and told them their son was gay.
After considerable discussion about the phone call with his parents, Garrard finally came out to them. It was devastating for his parents. He was their only child. His mother had miscarried an older sibling in the 3rd trimester of her first pregnancy. Adding to the pain, Garrard's father was about to be ordained as a pastor in the Missionary Baptist church after years of owning a car dealership. It was the perfect storm. His father sought the advice of other pastors and it was concluded that the best course of action would be a Christian conversion therapy group called Love In Action located in Memphis, TN. And that is where the real story is and also in how it all played out.
You need to read the book. Suffice it to say that, in most circles, Conversion therapy has been discredited. Exodus International, which was the umbrella organization for many of these groups, was also over Love In Action. Exodus disbanded not long after the events in this book and so did Love In Action. There was almost no success in what they were trying to do. Even the group members that managed to marry say that they never completely lost their same sex attractions. And I think the problem with all these groups lies in there approach to the whole issue.
It is assumed by these groups that people with same sex attraction were somehow damaged by parents and family psychologically. Participants are urged to map out the sin in there families and how their parents treated them. Did you receive enough attention from Dad? Did he touch you and show you love. Was Mom overbearing? How did Grandpa's alcoholism effect your Dad and how he treated you?
Really! My thought here is that if bad parenting and family moral issues were the cause of homosexuality, half the world would be gay. That's just not the case.
Then there is the constant taking of moral inventory. Confession of every sex related sin, asking for forgiveness and trying to pray the gay away. In the program portrayed in this book, John Smid, the facilitator was constantly pushing the participants for these things. Frankly, when you're 18 or 19 and you're a Christian living in the southern US, you don't have all that much sexual experience to confess to. The whole process is filled with shaming and blaming and can do severe damage to a young psyche. Some participants were even making up stories so they had something to confess.
And you cannot treat same sex desire with a 12 step program. It is not an addiction like alcoholism, drug abuse or gambling. Becoming addicted to these things comes from experience. One would never know they were prone to alcoholism until they started drinking. One does not have to participate in homosexuality to know they are gay. Is straight sex required to learn of one's heterosexuality? No, of course not.
All of these things contributed to the demise of Ex-Gay therapy. There is more, but this is the worst of it. Though Exodus and LIA are out of the business, there are still groups, both religious and secular attempting to fix homosexuals. The practice has been made illegal in some states for minors and that is because well meaning parents were forcing their children against their will to participate in these programs. In my opinion, no one should be forced into these programs against their will. It should be strictly voluntary and for those 18 and older.
One more thing of note. John Smid, the founder of LIA is today living with his husband in Paris, Texas. After two failed marriages to women, he finally gave up his own battle with SSA and moved on. Similar things happened at Exodus. John Paulk, Exodus board member and Ex-gay poster boy, divorced his Ex-lesbian wife and took a husband too. Alan Chambers, the chairman of Exodus, remains married to his wife, but says he still has same sex attractions.
I hope you get what I'm saying here. Conversion therapy does not work. It just creates a bigger messes and can ruin lives and even cause suicides. My advice? Stay away from it.
I have some limited experience with this kind of therapy. Mine was not as intensive and 8 hours daily, but I did it for a year and guess what? I'm still gay.
Read the book and see what you think.
Thursday, November 1, 2018
Is It Art? Part 3
You may recall my last two art purchases. They were not your ordinary works. They provoked in me some kind of emotion or other, but what I particularly like is art that makes me laugh, and usually in an ironic way. I'm just so bored with the whole landscape, hotel room approach to decorating my living room. I need to interject some oddness that, in some ways, reflects my inner turmoil. Let's face it, I am odd for a number of reasons. The work below expresses some of my oddness, how I have felt from time to time. And it makes me laugh..it is so freaking funny. But I know some will look at this and be repulsed. To you I say, get over yourself and move along. If you want milquetoast art, visit a Holiday Inn. I'm sure they will have just what you want.
So...Is it art? You decide. I like it. I look at it and laugh. It makes me happy in a very ironic way. It was created by Eugene Heffron. He writes for Your Other Brothers at https://www.yourotherbrothers.com/ .
He created this work to go with a blog post that can be found at https://www.yourotherbrothers.com/2018/08/21/side-b-friendships-hard/ .
And now I would like to present to you...Bro White...it's OK to laugh...really it is.
It's currently at the framer's.
So...Is it art? You decide. I like it. I look at it and laugh. It makes me happy in a very ironic way. It was created by Eugene Heffron. He writes for Your Other Brothers at https://www.yourotherbrothers.com/ .
He created this work to go with a blog post that can be found at https://www.yourotherbrothers.com/2018/08/21/side-b-friendships-hard/ .
And now I would like to present to you...Bro White...it's OK to laugh...really it is.
It's currently at the framer's.
Wednesday, October 24, 2018
Why I Hate Ecclesiastes
7 Again I saw something meaningless under the sun:
8 There was a man all alone;
he had neither son nor brother.
There was no end to his toil,
yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.
“For whom am I toiling,” he asked,
“and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”
This too is meaningless—
a miserable business!
he had neither son nor brother.
There was no end to his toil,
yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.
“For whom am I toiling,” he asked,
“and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”
This too is meaningless—
a miserable business!
9 Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Saturday, October 13, 2018
Is It Art Part Two?
I just got my most recent piece of original art from Zachary Gladwin. I have to say this one resembles the son I never had. I call him Troll Baby. I love him. His under bite and nostrils crack me up and I don't think has ever had a baby shower because there is stuff growing on him. He's a baby that only his father could love. He's so cute.
I put him on the wall by the stairway so I can look at him everyday. He's so sweet.
I put him on the wall by the stairway so I can look at him everyday. He's so sweet.
Is It Art?
This is my first piece of original art. Until now everything has been prints. The artist is Zachary Gladwin. I have another one coming that I will share once it is mounted and framed. I ended up putting this one under the clock in the living room next to the front door. The subject matter is interesting; a poisonous spider on poison ivy. The next one should be even more interesting...can't wait to show you.
Monday, October 8, 2018
October is National Coming Out Month
October is National Coming Out Month. Isn't that exciting? No? Oh come on, really? You know, it's not just a gay thing right? Think about it. When you were called to Christ by the power of the Gospel before witnesses, did you not come out of the world of sin and into the glorious light of our Lord and Savior?
Yes, I'm thinking that we all need to come out. We need to bring transparency to our lives before each other as believers and before the world. We have to show the world what Jesus saved us from and we need accountability with Him and each other to ensure that we do not go back into sin's closet.
Sin is the big closet my friends. It can keep us locked up for so long that we can forget what freedom looks like. That closet can also become our grave. We cannot let it happen.
So come out my friends and live. Throw off the chains of sins that bind you and be who you were meant to be. No more hiding. No more faking it. No more secrets. Confess and be free.
Sounds easy right? It's not.
You will need the support, advice and love of all the others that have come out. The road out is narrow, but the path is straight - and isn't that last bit ironic for someone like me?
So come out. Be known. Show yourself, receive grace and join us. See ya in church. Luv ya!
Yes, I'm thinking that we all need to come out. We need to bring transparency to our lives before each other as believers and before the world. We have to show the world what Jesus saved us from and we need accountability with Him and each other to ensure that we do not go back into sin's closet.
Sin is the big closet my friends. It can keep us locked up for so long that we can forget what freedom looks like. That closet can also become our grave. We cannot let it happen.
So come out my friends and live. Throw off the chains of sins that bind you and be who you were meant to be. No more hiding. No more faking it. No more secrets. Confess and be free.
Sounds easy right? It's not.
You will need the support, advice and love of all the others that have come out. The road out is narrow, but the path is straight - and isn't that last bit ironic for someone like me?
So come out. Be known. Show yourself, receive grace and join us. See ya in church. Luv ya!
Thursday, September 20, 2018
Romans 8
Have you ever sat down and read Romans 8. I don't mean just the last uplifting and encouraging part. I mean the whole chapter. It speaks volumes to the human condition and what it means to truly live by the Spirit of God. The meat of the chapter is really here - at least for me.
Romans 8:5-17
5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.
9 You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. 10 But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life[d] because of righteousness. 11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of[e] his Spirit who lives in you.
12 Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 13 For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.
14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,[g] Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
Is your life as a believer ruled by your flesh or by His Spirit? How do you know the flesh is ruling?
Sometimes the answer to that last question is obvious. Look in the mirror. Service to the flesh may be apparent. Do you eat so much that you look like a weeble? Do you work out so much that you can't pass a mirror without checking yourself out? Do you constantly worry about what people think of you or your personal appearance or how you choose to live? Do you spend too much on clothes?
Or maybe when you glance into the spiritual mirror of the scriptures, you are horrified by what you see there. Do you look anything like Jesus? Does the mind dwell less on the heavenly and more on the physical and earthly things of this present world? There is beauty in God's creation that be perverted to many different uses. Our senses can deceive us. Our corrupted physical natures can get us in trouble.
We need to live by His Spirit and sift out the sin in our lives while enjoying in moderation the things that make life enjoyable. Test these things. See if they are good and enjoy your salvation in the here and now. As to those things we find in our lives that pull us down into fleshly realm of distortion and abuse, we have to reject these thing, resist them and move on.
The writer of Hebrews said, " In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood."
He was right. Let's rid ourselves of the sin in our lives and let God speak truth to our souls that we may live for Him. Life will be better.
Romans 8:5-17
5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.
9 You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. 10 But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life[d] because of righteousness. 11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of[e] his Spirit who lives in you.
12 Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 13 For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.
14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,[g] Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
Is your life as a believer ruled by your flesh or by His Spirit? How do you know the flesh is ruling?
Sometimes the answer to that last question is obvious. Look in the mirror. Service to the flesh may be apparent. Do you eat so much that you look like a weeble? Do you work out so much that you can't pass a mirror without checking yourself out? Do you constantly worry about what people think of you or your personal appearance or how you choose to live? Do you spend too much on clothes?
Or maybe when you glance into the spiritual mirror of the scriptures, you are horrified by what you see there. Do you look anything like Jesus? Does the mind dwell less on the heavenly and more on the physical and earthly things of this present world? There is beauty in God's creation that be perverted to many different uses. Our senses can deceive us. Our corrupted physical natures can get us in trouble.
We need to live by His Spirit and sift out the sin in our lives while enjoying in moderation the things that make life enjoyable. Test these things. See if they are good and enjoy your salvation in the here and now. As to those things we find in our lives that pull us down into fleshly realm of distortion and abuse, we have to reject these thing, resist them and move on.
The writer of Hebrews said, " In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood."
He was right. Let's rid ourselves of the sin in our lives and let God speak truth to our souls that we may live for Him. Life will be better.
Tuesday, September 18, 2018
61
I told someone yesterday that I remembered when my church had outhouses. They were out in back of the building and almost in the corn field. What I didn't tell him was that I also remember when my grandpa had to replenish the church baptistery with water anytime that new Christians were expected on Sunday. I think he said it took 32 milk cans of water to fill it to proper levels. In the winter, he had to warm the outside of the building's foundation with a corn cob fire to warm the water on the inside of the baptistery. It was a job to birth new Christians back then. It suppose it was better than chopping a hole in Des Moines river ice.
I've seen many things in my life that most take for granted because of the times. Today we are accustomed to seeing history take place before our very eyes, but it was a fairly new thing when I was young.
I saw President Kennedy shot. I saw his alleged assassin shot. Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy went down on TV. It was in black and white at my house. I remember the race riots of the late 1960's and the Vietnam war protests. I remember seeing men walk on the moon, wondering if it was real. Nixon resigned after a lengthy scandal in 1974 as his impeachment loomed. President Reagan took a bullet on the evening news. The personal computer was invented. After some failed starts, phones became portable; no longer plugged into a wall.These are just the highlights.
Hideous striped and plaid bell bottoms with platform shoes and quilted shirts filled my closet. I had a leisure suit, a blow drier and hair down to my shoulders. At my college graduation, I wore a powder blue suit that screamed to the world, this one in gay, but no one was listening...thankfully. I also weighed 179 lbs. That's never going to happen again.
Today we are accustomed to life changing fast. Most of the time we don't even notice. But I witnessed the acceleration. The world is now at breakneck speed. We should crash soon. It will not be a happy time. I'm hoping to miss that event.
Today I received a birthday wish from an on-line friend that said, "May Jesus draw you ever closer to Himself this coming year", to which I said, "Thanks man. That's the best birthday wish. Will I be inside or outside the body during that process?🙃"
I've seen many things in my life that most take for granted because of the times. Today we are accustomed to seeing history take place before our very eyes, but it was a fairly new thing when I was young.
I saw President Kennedy shot. I saw his alleged assassin shot. Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy went down on TV. It was in black and white at my house. I remember the race riots of the late 1960's and the Vietnam war protests. I remember seeing men walk on the moon, wondering if it was real. Nixon resigned after a lengthy scandal in 1974 as his impeachment loomed. President Reagan took a bullet on the evening news. The personal computer was invented. After some failed starts, phones became portable; no longer plugged into a wall.These are just the highlights.
Hideous striped and plaid bell bottoms with platform shoes and quilted shirts filled my closet. I had a leisure suit, a blow drier and hair down to my shoulders. At my college graduation, I wore a powder blue suit that screamed to the world, this one in gay, but no one was listening...thankfully. I also weighed 179 lbs. That's never going to happen again.
Today we are accustomed to life changing fast. Most of the time we don't even notice. But I witnessed the acceleration. The world is now at breakneck speed. We should crash soon. It will not be a happy time. I'm hoping to miss that event.
Today I received a birthday wish from an on-line friend that said, "May Jesus draw you ever closer to Himself this coming year", to which I said, "Thanks man. That's the best birthday wish. Will I be inside or outside the body during that process?🙃"
You begin to think about such things more often after 60. It does not worry me so much now as it did when I was 30. The future is certain though and I can say that with a confidence that I have never felt before. It probably won't make the evening news when I when I hear the Golden Bells, but I'm starting to look forward to it. Sunday is coming, but I have no travel plans just yet!!! I renewed my driver's license last week for 8 years. I would like to get my money's worth. I will be 69 in 2026. I never thought I would ever be that old. Let's see if it happens.
Monday, September 17, 2018
Celibacy, Chastity and the Single Christian
I had a conversation yesterday with a soon to be single, Christian person that wanted to know how to live without sex. I did not have many good answers just off the top of my head. I usually need to mull things over. I process very slowly. You would think after 38 years of living without a sex partner, I would be able to spew tons of advice, but the fact is that I have not done this by myself. I have a God that has watched over me all my life and He is bent on saving my soul whether I cooperate or not. This is no small factor. It's also easier for me because I'm not all that attractive and that seems to keep potential partners away from my door. There was a time in 1979 when I was good looking for about 20 minutes, but the danger passed quickly.
That's an exaggeration. I was actually involved with someone for about 18 months in 1978-79 While I was in college. I told God and myself when it was over that I would never do that again unless Mr Right showed up at my door. All I can say is that he must be lost because he never arrived and I did not go out looking for him.
That last bit is key to living a life without sex. There are things you do not do and places you do not go if you want to avoid the possibility of sex or even the temptation. And that would include sex with yourself....there I said it. Staying clean outwardly and physically is one thing. It might even be easy. But if you want that to happen, you may need to stay clean the inside too. If the inside is clean, the outside will just fall into line. So police your life. Stay out of bars that promote a hook up culture, stay off certain websites and away from porn and by all means, try to avoid taking matters into your own hands. Avoiding this kind of personal intimacy is important in keeping the house clean. I've heard it said that masturbation is more like a cough or a sneeze or a belch or a fart than it is a sex act. It's just a relief valve. I have said that myself in the past. I have come to believe it's a gateway 'drug'. Whatever you think about auto-eroticism, begin thinking about it in terms of a clean mind and heart and see if that changes what you think about it.
The scriptures tell us in no uncertain terms what God's intentions are for human sexuality. His design was originally for sex to take place only between people of opposite sexes in marriage. If you are not in a marriage with a member of the opposite sex, then sex is off limits. If you are a believer and you are not married or you are divorced or your attractions are messed up (like mine), and you wish to remain within the will of God and in obedience to Him, you must give it up.
So am I talking about a life of celibacy and chastity and what do those words really mean as they apply to the single person's Christian life?
My first thought is that these terms are different and mean different things. All Christians are called to practice chastity whether single or married. Chastity is the proper observance of God's commands with regard to sexuality. If you're single, it means you do not have sex at all. If you are married, it means you have sex only with your marriage partner. And everyone must practice chastity of the mind and heart. As I said earlier, a clean mind and heart makes everything else easier.
Celibacy goes beyond chastity in some ways and may actually be a spiritual gift. It is a voluntary submission to a life without sex and family and in dedication to fuller service of God and His Church. Though one may well be able to marry in the traditional sense, this ability is given up for a higher, more noble purpose. See Matthew 19:10, 11 and also I Corinthians 7.
So what about those of us that do not have this gift of celibacy? We did not volunteer for it? We did not ask for it. But because of the situations of our lives, we must live without sex to please God.
Well, if you are single, you can marry. Some think that if you are divorced, you can remarry. I'm not so sure about that - again see Matthew 19. But what if your sexual inclinations are toward the same sex? What then?
Outside of marriage to an opposite sex partner, there are no real options for God approved sex. A chaste life is required to please God. Chastity. Purity. Sexless love. That last one is tough, but it can be done.
So, keep you pants on my single friends. Mount the bull of chastity and hang on for dear life. You will need to stay on for more than 8 seconds.
That's supposed to be funny.
That's an exaggeration. I was actually involved with someone for about 18 months in 1978-79 While I was in college. I told God and myself when it was over that I would never do that again unless Mr Right showed up at my door. All I can say is that he must be lost because he never arrived and I did not go out looking for him.
That last bit is key to living a life without sex. There are things you do not do and places you do not go if you want to avoid the possibility of sex or even the temptation. And that would include sex with yourself....there I said it. Staying clean outwardly and physically is one thing. It might even be easy. But if you want that to happen, you may need to stay clean the inside too. If the inside is clean, the outside will just fall into line. So police your life. Stay out of bars that promote a hook up culture, stay off certain websites and away from porn and by all means, try to avoid taking matters into your own hands. Avoiding this kind of personal intimacy is important in keeping the house clean. I've heard it said that masturbation is more like a cough or a sneeze or a belch or a fart than it is a sex act. It's just a relief valve. I have said that myself in the past. I have come to believe it's a gateway 'drug'. Whatever you think about auto-eroticism, begin thinking about it in terms of a clean mind and heart and see if that changes what you think about it.
The scriptures tell us in no uncertain terms what God's intentions are for human sexuality. His design was originally for sex to take place only between people of opposite sexes in marriage. If you are not in a marriage with a member of the opposite sex, then sex is off limits. If you are a believer and you are not married or you are divorced or your attractions are messed up (like mine), and you wish to remain within the will of God and in obedience to Him, you must give it up.
So am I talking about a life of celibacy and chastity and what do those words really mean as they apply to the single person's Christian life?
My first thought is that these terms are different and mean different things. All Christians are called to practice chastity whether single or married. Chastity is the proper observance of God's commands with regard to sexuality. If you're single, it means you do not have sex at all. If you are married, it means you have sex only with your marriage partner. And everyone must practice chastity of the mind and heart. As I said earlier, a clean mind and heart makes everything else easier.
Celibacy goes beyond chastity in some ways and may actually be a spiritual gift. It is a voluntary submission to a life without sex and family and in dedication to fuller service of God and His Church. Though one may well be able to marry in the traditional sense, this ability is given up for a higher, more noble purpose. See Matthew 19:10, 11 and also I Corinthians 7.
So what about those of us that do not have this gift of celibacy? We did not volunteer for it? We did not ask for it. But because of the situations of our lives, we must live without sex to please God.
Well, if you are single, you can marry. Some think that if you are divorced, you can remarry. I'm not so sure about that - again see Matthew 19. But what if your sexual inclinations are toward the same sex? What then?
Outside of marriage to an opposite sex partner, there are no real options for God approved sex. A chaste life is required to please God. Chastity. Purity. Sexless love. That last one is tough, but it can be done.
So, keep you pants on my single friends. Mount the bull of chastity and hang on for dear life. You will need to stay on for more than 8 seconds.
That's supposed to be funny.
Friday, September 14, 2018
Reflections - Friends That Made A Difference
If my twenties were lived in rebellion against God, my thirties and early forties could be characterized as mostly living without Him. Perhaps it is more correct to say that I kept a considerable distance from Him. It was not that I did not believe. It had more to do with the fact that I did not believe He loved me as He did His other children. I would not even go so far as to say I felt like He tolerated me. I truly believed that because of my same sex attractions, I was an abomination in His eyes. I also thought that if I belonged to a church in those days and this became known, it would sour the relationship. I would either be marginalized or cast out. So in those days, I did not darken a church door.
Early on, I was angry about this alleged state of affairs, and as I aged, this anger smoldered into a slow hot burning sadness that I cannot describe. It was the single worst depression of my life and I think the only reason I did not harm myself was because of my friends at work and the work itself. God sometimes gives us things to do while we sit in self imposed detention. I got work.
There was also a very close friendship that got me through those times and she knows who she is. I felt fully known by her. We had been friends since our days in church youth group. She was among the first that knew I was gay.She had a gift of empathy - probably still does - that helps her to listen. She was never one to mince words either. We would also be very frank and honest with each other on most occasions and throughout our friendship and this could be good or hurt or both. I suppose it's as close as I will ever come to being married. I say this even though I lived in a different city and state at the time. We exchanged letters and frequent phone calls. We vacationed together at least a couple of times. And when I was back in our home state, we would do things together. We were not alike. The relationship was built on complimentarianism. We were at opposite ends of the political and religious spectrum, but we could still make it work. It was by far, the most challenging and rewarding relationship I had ever enjoyed in my life up to that time. She kept me thinking and kept me from stagnating and most especially when we disagreed. I always looked forward to out time together. I think we will come together again in heaven...probably not here though.
When I was finally able to move back to my home state with my job intact, we spent much time together. I lived in a city that was 20 minutes away from hers. As we both aged, our views about politics in particular, began to separate us. We went our separate ways for a time. This time without her was actually good for me. I began to search for ways to get back in touch with my Creator and I was also looking for a way to get back to my hometown which was two hours away. I would go home on weekends to visit my parents. On Sundays they went to church...and so did I. I began hearing things that bothered me. Things like 'God loves me unconditionally' and that 'He welcomes home His lost children'. In my early years in church, I don't think I understood my heavenly Father this way. My theology at the time did allow for this kind of love and forgiveness. It was as if God was tearing down my childhood belief system and replacing it with something more orthodox. As it turned out, that is exactly what was happening. Before I knew it, I was driving two hours to church every weekend. In time, I became a teacher. God used what I already knew, gave me a revised version and allowed me to share it with others. It was not long after that my job took me back home and I was back in the family of God at the same time.
Sometime in my late forties, or maybe I was in my fifties, another person showed up in my life. He came in the form of a pastor. I have always been suspicious of people that make their living that way (;^) and I was never one to trust easily, but this guy was not going to bend to my standards. He kind of insisted on being my friend. This was weird for a number of reasons. I was not in the demographic of his ministry assignment, he is 18 years younger than me and he is married with kids. He had heard somewhere that I liked to fish. He wanted to go fishing with me. I turned him down at least a couple of times. I think I did this because I had never had a straight man express so much interest in me. His appearance also presented a problem for me. He was waaaay too good looking for an SSA guy to hang with. I also surmised that he had and exaggerated sense of his own importance and since I do enjoy deflating egos (I am so funny), I finally assented to his request. We spent a day together fishing. It was the best day of my new found faith as a recovering sinner to that point in time. We became friends. To this day and even though he is not here, we are still friends. There have been disagreements (such is life with me), but I am pleased to report that our friendship is solid, though long distance, which might be what makes it work.
And I hope he will forgive me for talking about him on line... Dude...I love you. It's OK.
Whatever. I guess my point is that friendships can be pivotal in our development and even God given. These two people have had an enormous influence on my life. They helped me shatter personal and spiritual barriers in my trek back to God. I never thought I would have friends like these, but praise the Lord, I did/do.
And that brings us to now. I have two small groups of close friends. We dine regularly together. Tonight I will enjoy a few of them.
And I have another friend....God keeps sending me pastors (what's up with that?)...this one is weirder than the last one (;^)
He loved me enough to help me out of the closet in front of my church. Try that sometime. It has been one of the best things I have ever done - overall. There are still some days when I regret it, but really, it's like someone took a 1000 lb granite rock off my soul. The freedom I feel at 61 years old is like nothing I have ever experienced...and the adventure should continue for a bit longer. Thanks my friend. I love you!
So, to Friends...I recommend them. Trust someone today. Start with God and He will point you in the right direction.
Luv ya!
JB
Early on, I was angry about this alleged state of affairs, and as I aged, this anger smoldered into a slow hot burning sadness that I cannot describe. It was the single worst depression of my life and I think the only reason I did not harm myself was because of my friends at work and the work itself. God sometimes gives us things to do while we sit in self imposed detention. I got work.
There was also a very close friendship that got me through those times and she knows who she is. I felt fully known by her. We had been friends since our days in church youth group. She was among the first that knew I was gay.She had a gift of empathy - probably still does - that helps her to listen. She was never one to mince words either. We would also be very frank and honest with each other on most occasions and throughout our friendship and this could be good or hurt or both. I suppose it's as close as I will ever come to being married. I say this even though I lived in a different city and state at the time. We exchanged letters and frequent phone calls. We vacationed together at least a couple of times. And when I was back in our home state, we would do things together. We were not alike. The relationship was built on complimentarianism. We were at opposite ends of the political and religious spectrum, but we could still make it work. It was by far, the most challenging and rewarding relationship I had ever enjoyed in my life up to that time. She kept me thinking and kept me from stagnating and most especially when we disagreed. I always looked forward to out time together. I think we will come together again in heaven...probably not here though.
When I was finally able to move back to my home state with my job intact, we spent much time together. I lived in a city that was 20 minutes away from hers. As we both aged, our views about politics in particular, began to separate us. We went our separate ways for a time. This time without her was actually good for me. I began to search for ways to get back in touch with my Creator and I was also looking for a way to get back to my hometown which was two hours away. I would go home on weekends to visit my parents. On Sundays they went to church...and so did I. I began hearing things that bothered me. Things like 'God loves me unconditionally' and that 'He welcomes home His lost children'. In my early years in church, I don't think I understood my heavenly Father this way. My theology at the time did allow for this kind of love and forgiveness. It was as if God was tearing down my childhood belief system and replacing it with something more orthodox. As it turned out, that is exactly what was happening. Before I knew it, I was driving two hours to church every weekend. In time, I became a teacher. God used what I already knew, gave me a revised version and allowed me to share it with others. It was not long after that my job took me back home and I was back in the family of God at the same time.
Sometime in my late forties, or maybe I was in my fifties, another person showed up in my life. He came in the form of a pastor. I have always been suspicious of people that make their living that way (;^) and I was never one to trust easily, but this guy was not going to bend to my standards. He kind of insisted on being my friend. This was weird for a number of reasons. I was not in the demographic of his ministry assignment, he is 18 years younger than me and he is married with kids. He had heard somewhere that I liked to fish. He wanted to go fishing with me. I turned him down at least a couple of times. I think I did this because I had never had a straight man express so much interest in me. His appearance also presented a problem for me. He was waaaay too good looking for an SSA guy to hang with. I also surmised that he had and exaggerated sense of his own importance and since I do enjoy deflating egos (I am so funny), I finally assented to his request. We spent a day together fishing. It was the best day of my new found faith as a recovering sinner to that point in time. We became friends. To this day and even though he is not here, we are still friends. There have been disagreements (such is life with me), but I am pleased to report that our friendship is solid, though long distance, which might be what makes it work.
And I hope he will forgive me for talking about him on line... Dude...I love you. It's OK.
Whatever. I guess my point is that friendships can be pivotal in our development and even God given. These two people have had an enormous influence on my life. They helped me shatter personal and spiritual barriers in my trek back to God. I never thought I would have friends like these, but praise the Lord, I did/do.
And that brings us to now. I have two small groups of close friends. We dine regularly together. Tonight I will enjoy a few of them.
And I have another friend....God keeps sending me pastors (what's up with that?)...this one is weirder than the last one (;^)
He loved me enough to help me out of the closet in front of my church. Try that sometime. It has been one of the best things I have ever done - overall. There are still some days when I regret it, but really, it's like someone took a 1000 lb granite rock off my soul. The freedom I feel at 61 years old is like nothing I have ever experienced...and the adventure should continue for a bit longer. Thanks my friend. I love you!
So, to Friends...I recommend them. Trust someone today. Start with God and He will point you in the right direction.
Luv ya!
JB
Tuesday, September 11, 2018
A Gay Christian Reading List
I know. More gay stuff. Do I ever get tired of talking about it? Well, actually, no. I am obsessed with educating people about this particular issue. Christian people need to know that it's possible to be same sex attracted and also a child of God. Christians need to know how to deal with their gay friends and family members just as Jesus does. Christians need know what it's like to grow up gay in the church. All of the things and more are included in the reading list below. I would encourage you to seek out copies of these books and learn to love and empathize with my people. Most of these are available on Amazon except where otherwise noted.
1. "Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones" - Click on the title to find this one. This is an excellent primer for families and friends to reference. If you go to my church (you know who you are), it is available at Home Pointe for free and as long as supplies last. I may also be able to help you find a free copy.
9. “Struggle
Central: Quarter-Life Confessions of a Messed Up Christian” By Thomas Mark
Zuniga
This is by no means an exhaustive list. There are other publications available, but these I would recommend as a good start. Happy reading.
1. "Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones" - Click on the title to find this one. This is an excellent primer for families and friends to reference. If you go to my church (you know who you are), it is available at Home Pointe for free and as long as supplies last. I may also be able to help you find a free copy.
2. “Messy Grace”
by Caleb Kaltenbach
3. “Washed and
Waiting” by Wesley Hill
4. “Single, Gay,
Christian: A Personal Journey of Faith and Sexual Identity” by Gregory Coles
5. “All But
Invisible” by Nate Collins
6. “A Bigger
World Yet: Faith, Brotherhood and Same Sex Needs” by Tim Timmerman
7. “People to be
Loved: Why Homosexuality Is Not Just an Issue” by Dr. Preston Sprinkle
8. “Understanding
Gender Dysphoria” by Mark Yarhouse
This is by no means an exhaustive list. There are other publications available, but these I would recommend as a good start. Happy reading.
Saturday, September 8, 2018
Is It Possible To Be A Gay Christian?
It's an interesting question. It's interesting because it seems to be in contravention to what we learn in the New Testament about who we all are in Christ. If we have truly repented and died to our sinful past, if we are trying to enjoy the increasing sanctification of our spirits in denial and mortification of fleshly desire (sin in the body) why would anyone label themselves in such a fashion?
I think the key word in that last question is the word, "label".
There is a subtle, but important difference, between a label and a life experience. Same sex attracted people experience life through a different lens than most everyone else. Christians that experience same sex attraction understand this immediately and for us, it can shape our path toward sanctification, our relationship with God and our relationship with each other up to and including our relationships with straight same sex Christians.
So, I think the other key word here is "experience". One of humanity's most primal drives is sex. We know from Jesus, the apostles and the prophets that God's view of human sexuality gives only one approved option for sexual expression - marriage between one man and one woman for life. Anything else is sexual immorality and is roundly condemned in scripture.
Having said that, we have to ask, what if you experience the drive toward sex in a different way? What if the flesh is bent in such a way that the God approved expression of human sexuality is not possible? Christians that experience this are left with few options. We can enter into marriage with someone of the opposite sex with the hope that God can help us redeem same sex desires through partnership with a heterosexual or we can choose celibacy. Both paths can be difficult and fraught with potential pitfalls and, were it not for God working through his Holy Spirit in our lives, no Christian dealing with same sex attraction would be able to stand. Praise the Lord for his mighty hand and work in our lives.
All of this is to say that when you hear someone call themselves a gay Christian or a same sex attracted Christian, it does not mean we are labeling ourselves. It is instead, a description of our particular spiritual experience as we move toward more and more sanctification. Dealing with this experience has taken me a lifetime. Please do not discount it if you hear me call myself gay or same sex attracted. I mean, how else would you know my life experience as a Christian? How would you know what I have to deal with on a daily basis in the spiritual sense? I hope that's important to you as a believer.
Do you see what I'm getting at? I hope so. It is not a good time in the Christian world to get hung up on labels. We need to come together to fight our common enemy. Satan hates all of us and the brokenness of human sexuality in general has been a major wedge he has successfully driven in to the lives of otherwise spiritually healthy believers. We cannot let this happen anymore. Divorce and sexual immorality in our culture is a major problem and it has infected God's church to such a degree that younger generations are rejecting the faith as just another version of the same culture they live in, but with hypocrisy. We have to take a united stand against sin within the church and especially sexual sin because it is of the body; the same body where God's Holy Spirit dwells. We can do this by supporting each other and NOT quibbling over labels.
I think the key word in that last question is the word, "label".
There is a subtle, but important difference, between a label and a life experience. Same sex attracted people experience life through a different lens than most everyone else. Christians that experience same sex attraction understand this immediately and for us, it can shape our path toward sanctification, our relationship with God and our relationship with each other up to and including our relationships with straight same sex Christians.
So, I think the other key word here is "experience". One of humanity's most primal drives is sex. We know from Jesus, the apostles and the prophets that God's view of human sexuality gives only one approved option for sexual expression - marriage between one man and one woman for life. Anything else is sexual immorality and is roundly condemned in scripture.
Having said that, we have to ask, what if you experience the drive toward sex in a different way? What if the flesh is bent in such a way that the God approved expression of human sexuality is not possible? Christians that experience this are left with few options. We can enter into marriage with someone of the opposite sex with the hope that God can help us redeem same sex desires through partnership with a heterosexual or we can choose celibacy. Both paths can be difficult and fraught with potential pitfalls and, were it not for God working through his Holy Spirit in our lives, no Christian dealing with same sex attraction would be able to stand. Praise the Lord for his mighty hand and work in our lives.
All of this is to say that when you hear someone call themselves a gay Christian or a same sex attracted Christian, it does not mean we are labeling ourselves. It is instead, a description of our particular spiritual experience as we move toward more and more sanctification. Dealing with this experience has taken me a lifetime. Please do not discount it if you hear me call myself gay or same sex attracted. I mean, how else would you know my life experience as a Christian? How would you know what I have to deal with on a daily basis in the spiritual sense? I hope that's important to you as a believer.
Do you see what I'm getting at? I hope so. It is not a good time in the Christian world to get hung up on labels. We need to come together to fight our common enemy. Satan hates all of us and the brokenness of human sexuality in general has been a major wedge he has successfully driven in to the lives of otherwise spiritually healthy believers. We cannot let this happen anymore. Divorce and sexual immorality in our culture is a major problem and it has infected God's church to such a degree that younger generations are rejecting the faith as just another version of the same culture they live in, but with hypocrisy. We have to take a united stand against sin within the church and especially sexual sin because it is of the body; the same body where God's Holy Spirit dwells. We can do this by supporting each other and NOT quibbling over labels.
Thursday, September 6, 2018
What Did You Have For Lunch?
I Joined A Secret Club
I joined a secret club today. As a conspiracy theorist, you would think I would be ashamed of my hypocrisy. Secret societies are allegedly responsible for the downfall of western Christian civilization. The Freemasons, Skull and Bones, the Illuminati, the Club of Rome, the Ku Klux Klan and the Bohemian Club are just a few of the fraternal orders that seek to control the levers of power in public and religious institutions and government.
But the group I joined is not like these. It is, shall we say, a para-Christian fraternal order of celibate, same sex attracted brothers in Christ that have come together to support each other. Though I am not fully initiated in rites of this organization as yet, I believe what I will find is a group of men gathered in the name of Jesus to serve Him and each others. At least I hope that's where this is going. We will see.
Some of you that know me are already seeing potential problems here since I don't always socialize well. I like to argue. I enjoy humor that is at another's expense - sarcasm, irony, pathos - the list goes on. I enjoy crushing the traditions of others and tend to be intolerant of people that disagree with me...which is really everybody when I think about it. It's a wonder I have friends at all, but I digress. It makes you wonder how I even got into a church.
I'm kidding...mostly.
So why did I join this group? It's a logical question. I was thinking the other day that all of my close friends are straight with only a couple of exceptions that come to mind. These two are special to me, but they never seem to want to talk about the struggle. If they don't want to, I have respect that. It can be difficult to be in the closet and also express what you are feeling about SSA life with another person. I was in that situation for decades and I could not take it anymore. I had to come out. I needed to talk. And I might also add that my church has been very supportive and I appreciate that more than they will ever know. It's just that I need a group of friends that get me. I need to be with my people to a certain extent. I hate being the only one in the room. Sure, I'm a white guy and I blend in well, but now that everyone knows, I have become a minority within a minority. I imagine them seeing a little rainbow over my head amongst everyone else's halos, every time they look at me.
What I really want is a group of people like me at church. I'm sure those words just made my pastors and elders cringe if they are reading. But we need it. And more broadly, we need to minister to all the singles at church without pushing them toward marriage. If we want to marry, and God supports the idea, we will find a way so quit pushing please. It is not necessarily the Christian answer to all things sexual - maybe for you, but not for everyone. (see how tolerant I'm becoming)
So wish me the best on this adventure in which I endeavor to be part of a group. It may just kill me or be the best thing yet.
But the group I joined is not like these. It is, shall we say, a para-Christian fraternal order of celibate, same sex attracted brothers in Christ that have come together to support each other. Though I am not fully initiated in rites of this organization as yet, I believe what I will find is a group of men gathered in the name of Jesus to serve Him and each others. At least I hope that's where this is going. We will see.
Some of you that know me are already seeing potential problems here since I don't always socialize well. I like to argue. I enjoy humor that is at another's expense - sarcasm, irony, pathos - the list goes on. I enjoy crushing the traditions of others and tend to be intolerant of people that disagree with me...which is really everybody when I think about it. It's a wonder I have friends at all, but I digress. It makes you wonder how I even got into a church.
I'm kidding...mostly.
So why did I join this group? It's a logical question. I was thinking the other day that all of my close friends are straight with only a couple of exceptions that come to mind. These two are special to me, but they never seem to want to talk about the struggle. If they don't want to, I have respect that. It can be difficult to be in the closet and also express what you are feeling about SSA life with another person. I was in that situation for decades and I could not take it anymore. I had to come out. I needed to talk. And I might also add that my church has been very supportive and I appreciate that more than they will ever know. It's just that I need a group of friends that get me. I need to be with my people to a certain extent. I hate being the only one in the room. Sure, I'm a white guy and I blend in well, but now that everyone knows, I have become a minority within a minority. I imagine them seeing a little rainbow over my head amongst everyone else's halos, every time they look at me.
What I really want is a group of people like me at church. I'm sure those words just made my pastors and elders cringe if they are reading. But we need it. And more broadly, we need to minister to all the singles at church without pushing them toward marriage. If we want to marry, and God supports the idea, we will find a way so quit pushing please. It is not necessarily the Christian answer to all things sexual - maybe for you, but not for everyone. (see how tolerant I'm becoming)
So wish me the best on this adventure in which I endeavor to be part of a group. It may just kill me or be the best thing yet.
Friday, August 31, 2018
My Thoughts on The Future of the American Church - My Opinion
At 60 years old, I find myself wondering what my church will look like after I'm dead or maybe 100 years from now. Will it still exist? Will it have been transformed into something else more liberal and wishy washy? Will the rise of Islam in America turn it into a mosque?
My local church has been around since 1856 and I know much has changed since that time, but fundamentally, we still believe the same things about our Lord, the faith and the Bible. I would like to think that will continue, but who really knows? We are in an age of flux. Things could change for us and other churches that identify as evangelical and conservative.
So what is ahead for the American Church? How does the commitment of future generations of Christians, or even the ones coming up in the Church now, stack up against the pillars of the past in the American evangelical church? Will they do church in the same way we do, or is our current pattern of worship dying out? Will the emphasis still be on real estate heavy infrastructure or will there be a move to something simpler? What will this future Church be doing that might be considered spiritual and obedient to the Word of our God and will it be different from what has been our vision? These are valid questions, and frankly, they are my questions right here and now.
The pre World War II generation of American Christians is just about gone. Us Baby Boomers are getting quite long in the tooth. The Gen X youngsters in the church are looking for new ways, and the Millennials are gonna be trouble in my estimation. Those that come after the Millennials could go many ways. They could be more conservative than their forebears and create a movement within the Church of 'back to basics' or they may opt out all together. As I see it, it will be the Millennials that influence whatever comes after us Baby Boomers in the Church and this will in turn influence those that come after them. The future of the Church belongs to the Millennials.
Us Baby Boomers are passing on a considerable legacy to Gen X and the Millennials. It is both good and bad to some extent. We tend to be solid in our beliefs, we are not afraid to reach out in faith, even when there is a cost attached and we tend to respect tradition and the idea of the nuclear family. The problem is that this is also our weakness; it is what will drive many Millennials to rebellion against what we see as the Biblical Church.
The Baby Boomers are also leaving considerable monetary debt, both in terms of government debt and in terms of Church debt. The Millennials arrive in adulthood with much debt themselves. Enormous college loans and a future house payment will leave them debt slaves for decades. Their taxes will rise to pay off Baby Boomer desire for both guns and butter and the last thing on their minds will be financing a real estate centered local church. They will be looking for options and the Churches will have to be ready to respond with new ideas.
Do we need these enormous temples filled with multi media equipment, comfortable chairs, church nurseries, on-line sermons, websites and classrooms? Is this not overhead that is unaffordable and uncalled for in the Bible? Are we wasting valuable resources and sacrificing missional outlook when we opt for comfort and convenience over the bare essentials? Are we not called to stewardship of what God has given us and did He not tell us to care for widows, orphans and the poor?
In a day when churches have such immense sums of money within their congregations, is it right to spend it on comfort? Is this what we've come to? Are we just playing 'church' or are we serious about saving souls? (We must be because we pay men to do it for us. Please forgive my sarcasm. I know that there are men called to do exactly that.)
I am trying to make you all think here people. We do a lot of extra biblical things today in our pursuit of the faith. We need to be more forward looking. We can worship in a pole barn or a rented warehouse and be planning a less expensive, more expansive future if we consider some of these questions now and arrive at sound Biblical answers.
I heard someone say last night that visiting outsiders will judge us by the appearance of our building. The backdrop of that was that ancient Israel let the temple go into decay and became separated from God. My thought is that they became separated from God when they had the wrong priorities. They worshipped other gods and completely forgot about Yahweh and His Law. And so the temple began to fall apart.
I personally think that outsiders are likely to judge us by our hearts to see if we are like Jesus or are just interested in more bread and circuses. I also believe that the Millennials will be most concerned with this question and NOT....is the building nice.
The future of the American Church is really in God's hands. If we fail to see the writing on the wall and reform our ways, He will do it for us. That's just how much He loves us.
I truly believe the day is coming when tithes will no longer be tax deductible. Churches will be taxed on both property and income. And pastors will be forced into paying social security taxes. It may even become illegal to be Christian. I think we need to prepare for this.
Beyond that, I think the modern evangelical church needs to look at it's idolatry of family in an open an honest way. Millennials and those that come after are going to be far less likely to marry early and many are going to opt for no marriage at all. They have seen and experienced the divorce culture both inside and outside the church and they have realized that it may well not be worth the effort.
We have to do something with and for our singles membership besides simply pushing them toward marriage. Single people need options for service and they should not be disqualified from service for that reason alone.
Think about the future my Brethren. It will not be like what has gone before. We need to be thinking about these things now before it's too late or the Lord has to step in to fix it. God shattered Israel like a pane of glass to fix her. What will He do with His Church?
My local church has been around since 1856 and I know much has changed since that time, but fundamentally, we still believe the same things about our Lord, the faith and the Bible. I would like to think that will continue, but who really knows? We are in an age of flux. Things could change for us and other churches that identify as evangelical and conservative.
So what is ahead for the American Church? How does the commitment of future generations of Christians, or even the ones coming up in the Church now, stack up against the pillars of the past in the American evangelical church? Will they do church in the same way we do, or is our current pattern of worship dying out? Will the emphasis still be on real estate heavy infrastructure or will there be a move to something simpler? What will this future Church be doing that might be considered spiritual and obedient to the Word of our God and will it be different from what has been our vision? These are valid questions, and frankly, they are my questions right here and now.
The pre World War II generation of American Christians is just about gone. Us Baby Boomers are getting quite long in the tooth. The Gen X youngsters in the church are looking for new ways, and the Millennials are gonna be trouble in my estimation. Those that come after the Millennials could go many ways. They could be more conservative than their forebears and create a movement within the Church of 'back to basics' or they may opt out all together. As I see it, it will be the Millennials that influence whatever comes after us Baby Boomers in the Church and this will in turn influence those that come after them. The future of the Church belongs to the Millennials.
Us Baby Boomers are passing on a considerable legacy to Gen X and the Millennials. It is both good and bad to some extent. We tend to be solid in our beliefs, we are not afraid to reach out in faith, even when there is a cost attached and we tend to respect tradition and the idea of the nuclear family. The problem is that this is also our weakness; it is what will drive many Millennials to rebellion against what we see as the Biblical Church.
The Baby Boomers are also leaving considerable monetary debt, both in terms of government debt and in terms of Church debt. The Millennials arrive in adulthood with much debt themselves. Enormous college loans and a future house payment will leave them debt slaves for decades. Their taxes will rise to pay off Baby Boomer desire for both guns and butter and the last thing on their minds will be financing a real estate centered local church. They will be looking for options and the Churches will have to be ready to respond with new ideas.
Do we need these enormous temples filled with multi media equipment, comfortable chairs, church nurseries, on-line sermons, websites and classrooms? Is this not overhead that is unaffordable and uncalled for in the Bible? Are we wasting valuable resources and sacrificing missional outlook when we opt for comfort and convenience over the bare essentials? Are we not called to stewardship of what God has given us and did He not tell us to care for widows, orphans and the poor?
In a day when churches have such immense sums of money within their congregations, is it right to spend it on comfort? Is this what we've come to? Are we just playing 'church' or are we serious about saving souls? (We must be because we pay men to do it for us. Please forgive my sarcasm. I know that there are men called to do exactly that.)
I am trying to make you all think here people. We do a lot of extra biblical things today in our pursuit of the faith. We need to be more forward looking. We can worship in a pole barn or a rented warehouse and be planning a less expensive, more expansive future if we consider some of these questions now and arrive at sound Biblical answers.
I heard someone say last night that visiting outsiders will judge us by the appearance of our building. The backdrop of that was that ancient Israel let the temple go into decay and became separated from God. My thought is that they became separated from God when they had the wrong priorities. They worshipped other gods and completely forgot about Yahweh and His Law. And so the temple began to fall apart.
I personally think that outsiders are likely to judge us by our hearts to see if we are like Jesus or are just interested in more bread and circuses. I also believe that the Millennials will be most concerned with this question and NOT....is the building nice.
The future of the American Church is really in God's hands. If we fail to see the writing on the wall and reform our ways, He will do it for us. That's just how much He loves us.
I truly believe the day is coming when tithes will no longer be tax deductible. Churches will be taxed on both property and income. And pastors will be forced into paying social security taxes. It may even become illegal to be Christian. I think we need to prepare for this.
Beyond that, I think the modern evangelical church needs to look at it's idolatry of family in an open an honest way. Millennials and those that come after are going to be far less likely to marry early and many are going to opt for no marriage at all. They have seen and experienced the divorce culture both inside and outside the church and they have realized that it may well not be worth the effort.
We have to do something with and for our singles membership besides simply pushing them toward marriage. Single people need options for service and they should not be disqualified from service for that reason alone.
Think about the future my Brethren. It will not be like what has gone before. We need to be thinking about these things now before it's too late or the Lord has to step in to fix it. God shattered Israel like a pane of glass to fix her. What will He do with His Church?
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
A Prayer of Frustration
Lord when we talk it's always the same
Thanks for this and for that, and so glad that you came
Please help me, please fix me, please make me all right
I just need me some peace so I can sleep tight
It's peace that I'm after and not so much stuff
A quieted mind without all the fluff
I stress about life with it's miseries
I just want to scream when I fall to my knees
Lord I can take much with regard to the pain
In my heart you rule, in my mind you do reign
But I'm still confused by the whys and the hows
And your purpose perplexes, makes me say 'holy cow'
Why did you bless me with desires in my flesh
That bring condemnation and create such a mess
And who do I blame if it was not You?
It was surely not me that brewed such bad stew
I will accept blame when control is my lack
I will own my behavior, It's mine to attack
But where comes the desire that I did not ask for
Is my flesh bent from Man's fall to the floor?
That my life should be strict, this I can accept
To not act on vile urges, this You can expect
But the urges themselves, from whence do they come?
They seem right to me, but the Word says that's dumb
If I live my life as seems to me normal
Then I go to hell and that will be horrible
So love is denied me in the physical sense
A touchless lifetime at sex's expense
To not know another as normal folks do
To live life alone when alone just won't do
It makes me angry and it makes me so sad
It makes me blame you Lord and that makes you mad
I'm sorry to blame you, I know it's not right
But I'm not right either and so thus I fight
To fight with my God, How stupid this be?
I lose everytime and You laugh much at me
Is this anyway to relationship make?
I guess it's a start if my soul You would take
Seems I start with a fight and I end with a whimper
Cause I need Your love without all the temper
You are my Abba, there's no way around it
That I don't understand You, that's what confounds it
I want to know You and I want to know why
I want You to fix it, but You only sigh
I know your love cost You and that it saved me
I know I am not as You'd have me to be
But I know too that I did not choose this
My thorn in my flesh is what makes me diss
You say sin is sin, that it's all just rebellion
And I try very hard not to be such a hellion
But when they are bent, these urges most primal
I'm so ashamed for it's sin in the Bible
To be like me, to want the unnatural
All hope becomes lost, condemnation is actual
I want what I want and that it be right
But you say that it's not and that makes me uptight
Finding reason and ration for why these things are
Has drawn us closer from times we were far
If this is Your point and Your purpose be this
Was there not some way other - other than this?
You say, "who are you boy to question your Lord"
I say, "I'm just asking, please sheath the sword"
Of clay I am made by Your Potter's hand
A vessel with purpose your design surely stand
What was it You wanted when you made me?
A vessel of wrath, my destruction soon be?
Or was something noble your plan and design?
In the hearth, in the kiln with great heat refined?
I hope that last bit is what you intend
And that you somehow can make my will bend
To go through this life with love unrequitted or
To end this life in hell just to be spitted
This I would ask, that not be your plan
Please help me to deal and to not want a man
If need be, please take me, please show me how
To lose sex's desire and to lose it all now
It's too late by this time for me to go straight
But to go forward now it's still not too late
To be neutered at this point would not matter to me
It would simplify life so free I could be
Just take this thing; just take it from me
Burn it in fire so no one can see
All the blame and the pain and reproach on myself,
The guilt and the shame and the sinning in stealth,
The fear for my life and my spiritual health,
I would have it end now, if it takes all my wealth
I'm bored by it all -I just want it over
Let it end with us being just that much more closer
Take me your vessel, and now fill me up
Wash me clean of the poison, make me your favorite cup
There on Your table by Your throne I would sit
I would bask in your power as You keep heaven lit
So do not depsise me when my thoughts wander
Please allow me some grace and some mercy to ponder
Let me feel your presence residing in me
Empower me now so I can be free
Thanks for loving and listening and being my Lord
I long for the day when I'll be restored
But for now I'll be happy to be your cup broken
With the cracks and the chips and not just some token.
Thanks for this and for that, and so glad that you came
Please help me, please fix me, please make me all right
I just need me some peace so I can sleep tight
It's peace that I'm after and not so much stuff
A quieted mind without all the fluff
I stress about life with it's miseries
I just want to scream when I fall to my knees
Lord I can take much with regard to the pain
In my heart you rule, in my mind you do reign
But I'm still confused by the whys and the hows
And your purpose perplexes, makes me say 'holy cow'
Why did you bless me with desires in my flesh
That bring condemnation and create such a mess
And who do I blame if it was not You?
It was surely not me that brewed such bad stew
I will accept blame when control is my lack
I will own my behavior, It's mine to attack
But where comes the desire that I did not ask for
Is my flesh bent from Man's fall to the floor?
That my life should be strict, this I can accept
To not act on vile urges, this You can expect
But the urges themselves, from whence do they come?
They seem right to me, but the Word says that's dumb
If I live my life as seems to me normal
Then I go to hell and that will be horrible
So love is denied me in the physical sense
A touchless lifetime at sex's expense
To not know another as normal folks do
To live life alone when alone just won't do
It makes me angry and it makes me so sad
It makes me blame you Lord and that makes you mad
I'm sorry to blame you, I know it's not right
But I'm not right either and so thus I fight
To fight with my God, How stupid this be?
I lose everytime and You laugh much at me
Is this anyway to relationship make?
I guess it's a start if my soul You would take
Seems I start with a fight and I end with a whimper
Cause I need Your love without all the temper
You are my Abba, there's no way around it
That I don't understand You, that's what confounds it
I want to know You and I want to know why
I want You to fix it, but You only sigh
I know your love cost You and that it saved me
I know I am not as You'd have me to be
But I know too that I did not choose this
My thorn in my flesh is what makes me diss
You say sin is sin, that it's all just rebellion
And I try very hard not to be such a hellion
But when they are bent, these urges most primal
I'm so ashamed for it's sin in the Bible
To be like me, to want the unnatural
All hope becomes lost, condemnation is actual
I want what I want and that it be right
But you say that it's not and that makes me uptight
Finding reason and ration for why these things are
Has drawn us closer from times we were far
If this is Your point and Your purpose be this
Was there not some way other - other than this?
You say, "who are you boy to question your Lord"
I say, "I'm just asking, please sheath the sword"
Of clay I am made by Your Potter's hand
A vessel with purpose your design surely stand
What was it You wanted when you made me?
A vessel of wrath, my destruction soon be?
Or was something noble your plan and design?
In the hearth, in the kiln with great heat refined?
I hope that last bit is what you intend
And that you somehow can make my will bend
To go through this life with love unrequitted or
To end this life in hell just to be spitted
This I would ask, that not be your plan
Please help me to deal and to not want a man
If need be, please take me, please show me how
To lose sex's desire and to lose it all now
It's too late by this time for me to go straight
But to go forward now it's still not too late
To be neutered at this point would not matter to me
It would simplify life so free I could be
Just take this thing; just take it from me
Burn it in fire so no one can see
All the blame and the pain and reproach on myself,
The guilt and the shame and the sinning in stealth,
The fear for my life and my spiritual health,
I would have it end now, if it takes all my wealth
I'm bored by it all -I just want it over
Let it end with us being just that much more closer
Take me your vessel, and now fill me up
Wash me clean of the poison, make me your favorite cup
There on Your table by Your throne I would sit
I would bask in your power as You keep heaven lit
So do not depsise me when my thoughts wander
Please allow me some grace and some mercy to ponder
Let me feel your presence residing in me
Empower me now so I can be free
Thanks for loving and listening and being my Lord
I long for the day when I'll be restored
But for now I'll be happy to be your cup broken
With the cracks and the chips and not just some token.
Tuesday, August 21, 2018
Monday, July 30, 2018
Random Events and Coincidences In Life
Yesterday was a good day to be in church. The pastor was in top form. He had just returned from a mountain retreat and he was well rested, relaxed and ready to go. The delivery, organization and research for the sermon was among his best. One of the major premises of the sermon was, however, in my view, incorrect and misleading, bordering on dangerous.
Let me say at the outset that this is my opinion. Most others present would agree with the pastor and I would be in the very small minority (as usual). Neither is this a personal attack on the pastor. I consider him my friend and I have a great deal of respect for him as a vocational minister. He is very good with people. It is his gift. You cannot go away feeling bad after talking to him. If you do, it's probably because you are the problem and not him.
I would also say that this may be one of those times where I point out a distinction where there is no difference. Perhaps we just have two ways of getting to the same place. I do not know. We will see.
My point of disagreement comes when he says that there are no coincidences in life or random events. Everything that happens in our reality has purpose and even a divine purpose for us and that we ourselves have special and specific purposes in this life.
I do not think this is correct or biblical or even close to being true and it might even be dangerous for young Christians to entertain these ideas as they were presented. Perhaps it is half true. I might be able to meet him there. Let me explain.
I would say that most events in the lives of rank and file Christians ARE random and / or coincidental. God is not directly involved in most of them unless we invite Him to help us deal with them. He has a general will for all our lives as revealed in the Bible. He has also created us all with specific abilities to enable us to serve Him in unique ways, unique specifically to ourselves and maybe a few others. Our calling in service to Him is to use the tools he gave us to react to the randomness and the coincidental events in our lives.
Learning to recognize these events should not be necessary or even required if we are following God's general will for us outlined in His scriptures. Our reaction to these random life events should simply be our automatic Christian response; our use of our God given abilities. None of this requires any specialness of purpose. Consider this parable.
Two parents give their children coloring books and two different sets of crayons each containing different shades and hues. They ask their children to work together to complete the coloring books to the best of their abilities regardless of what might come up on its' pages. The only thing the parents ask is that the children stay within the lines of the book's images to ensure a beautiful and unique product. Everything else would be up to them as they move from random image to random image.
And so the children begin their work, forced to cooperate because of the distinctiveness of their individual crayon colors and artistic skill levels. They have everything they need to move through this task as it was provided by their parents. Now if they refuse to do the work or ignore their parent's instruction about how to do it, they will have trouble coming their way. Obedience is their key to success.
And this is the way it is with us. We do not know what will come up in our life coloring books, but if we do the will of our Father and we use what He gave us, everything will be better because of the freedom He gave us to decide how to complete the task set before us. We are not special. We are not equal in our abilities. We are merely different in our approach and talent as we react to life's randomness and work together toward that end.
The danger in telling someone that they have a special purpose that no one else has should be self evident. When we become filled with the notion of specialness, we begin to view ourselves in a different light. We may even think more highly of ourselves than our brethren or at least more highly than we ought. There is also the danger of disappointment and loss of faith when the random events of our lives smack down that alleged specialness and we realize we are mere mortals after all.
Generally and historically speaking, the only people that seem to have special purpose and significance in God's overall purposes are those directly called by Him and those He speaks directly to. The Bible is filled with these people (prophets, apostles, etc) , but it is also filled with people that did God's will without any 'special' calling. They were merely obedient to what they knew from scripture was His true and perfect will.
To conclude, I would say that life is mostly random, meaningless, labor intensive and painful (see Genesis 3). It's what we do with what we've been given that makes it worth every one's time. While God is in control, He is not a control freak. He has given us decision making power - a bit of His sovereignty - to make life here a little less nasty and brutish, though short. We have the crayons. We just have to stay within the lines. Now go do some coloring.
Let me say at the outset that this is my opinion. Most others present would agree with the pastor and I would be in the very small minority (as usual). Neither is this a personal attack on the pastor. I consider him my friend and I have a great deal of respect for him as a vocational minister. He is very good with people. It is his gift. You cannot go away feeling bad after talking to him. If you do, it's probably because you are the problem and not him.
I would also say that this may be one of those times where I point out a distinction where there is no difference. Perhaps we just have two ways of getting to the same place. I do not know. We will see.
My point of disagreement comes when he says that there are no coincidences in life or random events. Everything that happens in our reality has purpose and even a divine purpose for us and that we ourselves have special and specific purposes in this life.
I do not think this is correct or biblical or even close to being true and it might even be dangerous for young Christians to entertain these ideas as they were presented. Perhaps it is half true. I might be able to meet him there. Let me explain.
I would say that most events in the lives of rank and file Christians ARE random and / or coincidental. God is not directly involved in most of them unless we invite Him to help us deal with them. He has a general will for all our lives as revealed in the Bible. He has also created us all with specific abilities to enable us to serve Him in unique ways, unique specifically to ourselves and maybe a few others. Our calling in service to Him is to use the tools he gave us to react to the randomness and the coincidental events in our lives.
Learning to recognize these events should not be necessary or even required if we are following God's general will for us outlined in His scriptures. Our reaction to these random life events should simply be our automatic Christian response; our use of our God given abilities. None of this requires any specialness of purpose. Consider this parable.
Two parents give their children coloring books and two different sets of crayons each containing different shades and hues. They ask their children to work together to complete the coloring books to the best of their abilities regardless of what might come up on its' pages. The only thing the parents ask is that the children stay within the lines of the book's images to ensure a beautiful and unique product. Everything else would be up to them as they move from random image to random image.
And so the children begin their work, forced to cooperate because of the distinctiveness of their individual crayon colors and artistic skill levels. They have everything they need to move through this task as it was provided by their parents. Now if they refuse to do the work or ignore their parent's instruction about how to do it, they will have trouble coming their way. Obedience is their key to success.
And this is the way it is with us. We do not know what will come up in our life coloring books, but if we do the will of our Father and we use what He gave us, everything will be better because of the freedom He gave us to decide how to complete the task set before us. We are not special. We are not equal in our abilities. We are merely different in our approach and talent as we react to life's randomness and work together toward that end.
The danger in telling someone that they have a special purpose that no one else has should be self evident. When we become filled with the notion of specialness, we begin to view ourselves in a different light. We may even think more highly of ourselves than our brethren or at least more highly than we ought. There is also the danger of disappointment and loss of faith when the random events of our lives smack down that alleged specialness and we realize we are mere mortals after all.
Generally and historically speaking, the only people that seem to have special purpose and significance in God's overall purposes are those directly called by Him and those He speaks directly to. The Bible is filled with these people (prophets, apostles, etc) , but it is also filled with people that did God's will without any 'special' calling. They were merely obedient to what they knew from scripture was His true and perfect will.
To conclude, I would say that life is mostly random, meaningless, labor intensive and painful (see Genesis 3). It's what we do with what we've been given that makes it worth every one's time. While God is in control, He is not a control freak. He has given us decision making power - a bit of His sovereignty - to make life here a little less nasty and brutish, though short. We have the crayons. We just have to stay within the lines. Now go do some coloring.
Wednesday, July 18, 2018
The Trump - Putin Summit
What is with the panic mode that every one in the press and in the intelligence community is enjoying in the wake of the Trump - Putin Summit? Nothing was decided. Nothing was signed. No one gave anything away. And yet, everyone seems appalled that our President actually tried to talk to the man with the power to destroy Europe and The US.
Forget the old adage, 'Keep your friends close and your enemies closer' and realize that without dialogue, the danger of war increases daily. So what if the Russian Federation meddled in our election? It's not like we have not done the same to them and scores of other countries around the world. We are responsible for coups all over the world. The war on terror has been a war to destabilize governments throughout the Mideast. This did not stop terrorism, but it did cause a flood of immigration into Europe and the US, the greatest invasion of sovereign nations in history.
This is the kind of thing the US intelligence community has been up to in just the last 20 years. Knowing this, why should Americans believe the US intelligence community when they say Russia tried to influence our elections?
My belief is that they have an agenda, a plan for the world, that does not have the best interests of the United States as first and foremost in the scheme. I am beginning to believe that they want a new cold war with an old enemy or maybe even a hot war. What's the motivation for this you ask? Increased military and intelligence spending. Enrichment of defense based industries. Strengthening of the security industrial complex.
The horrors of a war with Russia should be enough to bring anyone to the peace table. Even if it were merely a ground war, the casualties would be astronomical. Both Napoleon and Hitler thought they could take Russia. Both were summarily defeated. And a nuclear war with Russia would devastate the entire planet.
We have to talk to them. Control your Trump Derangement Syndrome long enough to realize that this is what needs to happen. It's time to move on people. Trump was heroic in Helsinki. He and Putin broke the ice. Let's move forward.
Forget the old adage, 'Keep your friends close and your enemies closer' and realize that without dialogue, the danger of war increases daily. So what if the Russian Federation meddled in our election? It's not like we have not done the same to them and scores of other countries around the world. We are responsible for coups all over the world. The war on terror has been a war to destabilize governments throughout the Mideast. This did not stop terrorism, but it did cause a flood of immigration into Europe and the US, the greatest invasion of sovereign nations in history.
This is the kind of thing the US intelligence community has been up to in just the last 20 years. Knowing this, why should Americans believe the US intelligence community when they say Russia tried to influence our elections?
My belief is that they have an agenda, a plan for the world, that does not have the best interests of the United States as first and foremost in the scheme. I am beginning to believe that they want a new cold war with an old enemy or maybe even a hot war. What's the motivation for this you ask? Increased military and intelligence spending. Enrichment of defense based industries. Strengthening of the security industrial complex.
The horrors of a war with Russia should be enough to bring anyone to the peace table. Even if it were merely a ground war, the casualties would be astronomical. Both Napoleon and Hitler thought they could take Russia. Both were summarily defeated. And a nuclear war with Russia would devastate the entire planet.
We have to talk to them. Control your Trump Derangement Syndrome long enough to realize that this is what needs to happen. It's time to move on people. Trump was heroic in Helsinki. He and Putin broke the ice. Let's move forward.
Tuesday, July 17, 2018
The Neighbors
I am a people watcher. I may have picked up the practice from my Dad. I remember when I was a kid going to lunch with him in the summer. We would get our fast food and he would then drive us to the local public pool. We would sit in the car in the pool parking lot next to the pool fence and eat. While I was engrossed in my food, Dad would be engrossed in the pool activity. I always thought there was something a bit perverse and voyeuristic about this practice, but it was also fun and funny to watch half naked people interact at the swimming pool. I always liked it when the life guard would get into it with a seven year old over the pool rules. The life guard was inevitably a high school sophomore that thought he was the local swimming pool god and the seven year olds at the pool would invariably try to undermine his alleged authority. Dad, however, seemed to be looking at something else. It was kind of disturbing and I will not go into, suffice it to say we were not watching the same things.
I still watch. People are fascinating. Say what you will, I like to watch people. I like to imagine their life stories. to pick up clues as to who they are and what they do and whether they are happy, or angst filled or depressed or whatever. It is the soap opera in my mind and it's better than TV. Today I am at a local lake contemplating some fishing and watching people as I type this stuff. I also frequent grocery store parking lots, fast food restaurants and coffee shops to watch the human drama. I can't seem to get enough of it. Finding a place to sit and watch on a cool day at the Iowa State Fair is another favorite. That's next month.
And that brings me to my neighbors. Some of you know that I moved back to my townhouse on the south side that I left 7 years ago. I am glad I did not sell it. I enjoy this little community where all the homes are exactly alike and all the people are completely different. To sit on my porch and watch in the early evening; that is one of my great pleasures. You can hear 4 or 5 different languages spoken as people groups walk by on the sidewalk. You can see men holding hands and rednecks with their confederate flag t-shirts and African Americans listening to rap. We are a very mixed group and I have invented life stories for all of them in my head. I will not testify to the reality of my head based drama, but I am to the point where I would like to test if my perceptions are anywhere near correct.
My next door neighbor is a single foster mother. She came home with her foster son before I moved out. I do not believe he was more than 7 years old at the time. When I moved back, he had become a young man that needs to shave and his mother seems daily frustrated by the fact that he does not take care of himself. One day he locked her out of the house. She sat outside in her lawn chair talking to him through an open window. He eventually let her back in the house, but the through the window conversation centered around her son's need for privacy. In my head, I imagined that she had found his porn stash and so the battle ensued.
My neighbor across the street is single. She likes my flowers. She moved into the hood in May. She is close to my age, but still works. Her children and grandchildren visit her with great regularity as does a man about my age with Warren county plates on his cars. I imagine this is her brother. I further imagine that she is divorced, that her husband left her for a younger woman or man and that the bitterness of this has all passed. I also think she is a nurse....she just seems like a nurse to me.
Another neighbor across the street that moved in back in May spent a great deal of time remodeling the place before he took up residence. He's about 26 years old, seems to be in a security oriented occupation and carries a hand gun. He is a single father of a son not more than 4 years old. His son is currently not with him. I assume he went to spend the summer with Mom in some other place not close to Iowa. He also has regular visitors. Two young females will show up at his house, sometimes with a baby that's not quite 2 years old. Sometimes they will leave the baby with him. I believe that one of the young women is his sister and the other a friend of both and that he baby sits for them. From what I've seen he seems to be a good father and a good friend. I gave him my old lawn chairs and table for his front porch and told him he could use them until he found something he really wanted. He still has not replaced them.
He also has something close to a complete gym in his garage; weight machines, free weights and a heavy bag that I have seen him beat the crap out of on several occasions. It is my guess that he is ex-military, that he was never married to the mother of his son and that he may have met her while serving somewhere.
On my side of the street next door to the foster mother is a corner unit that was purchased and occupied in June. Two young men moved in and set up housekeeping. I immediately jumped to the conclusion that they were newlyweds buying their first house, but this may not be the case. One of them could be the owner renting space to a friend or they could be two straight single guys buying a house together and building equity rather than paying rent. The possibilities are endless and they seem entirely mismatched if they are a couple. They do things together, mainly bicycle riding and I have never seen them touch each other. One of them is about 6'4" and weighs about 190 lbs with black hair and a scruffy beard. I believe he is Asian, but it's hard to tell with his thick glasses. The other one is about 5'9" and weighs about 135 lb. He has no facial hair at all, is Caucasian and blond.
The blond has a personality and a sense of humor. He drives a black KIA Soul and was in the driveway washing it last night when I came home from Redfield. I asked him if it was a good idea to wash his Soul right out in the open like that and he started laughing and said that someone had to do it. I said that it must be hard to keep such a dark Soul clean. Again laughing, he said, 'who are you' to which I said, 'I'm your neighbor' and walked away to take my groceries inside. his roomate is a dullard by comparison, creepy quiet and Aspie like in his demeanor.
Next door to my security oriented neighbor lives an old lady. I say old. She's about my age. She lived there before I left and she was still there when I came back. We all believe she has a direct line to the home shopping network. UPS and USPS stop at her place almost daily with packages. She cannot park in her garage because it is stacked floor to ceiling with these boxes. I imagine that she is a hoarder. I envision her living space clogged with stacks of coveted items she never uses and well worn paths through the house for her and her two yappy dogs that seem to hate everyone except her. She has also been trying to get every one's voting proxies for HOA meetings without success. Not sure what she's up to there, but we may find out. I did not give her mine.
When I lived there before, I did not go to the HOA meetings because I was working. Now that I am retired, I may take an interest. It could well be time to overthrow the existing council and take over. It would be a good way to see if my assumptions about my neighbors are correct. It would also be a superior position from whence to watch my neighbors and interact with them. I kind of want this. We will see.
I still watch. People are fascinating. Say what you will, I like to watch people. I like to imagine their life stories. to pick up clues as to who they are and what they do and whether they are happy, or angst filled or depressed or whatever. It is the soap opera in my mind and it's better than TV. Today I am at a local lake contemplating some fishing and watching people as I type this stuff. I also frequent grocery store parking lots, fast food restaurants and coffee shops to watch the human drama. I can't seem to get enough of it. Finding a place to sit and watch on a cool day at the Iowa State Fair is another favorite. That's next month.
And that brings me to my neighbors. Some of you know that I moved back to my townhouse on the south side that I left 7 years ago. I am glad I did not sell it. I enjoy this little community where all the homes are exactly alike and all the people are completely different. To sit on my porch and watch in the early evening; that is one of my great pleasures. You can hear 4 or 5 different languages spoken as people groups walk by on the sidewalk. You can see men holding hands and rednecks with their confederate flag t-shirts and African Americans listening to rap. We are a very mixed group and I have invented life stories for all of them in my head. I will not testify to the reality of my head based drama, but I am to the point where I would like to test if my perceptions are anywhere near correct.
My next door neighbor is a single foster mother. She came home with her foster son before I moved out. I do not believe he was more than 7 years old at the time. When I moved back, he had become a young man that needs to shave and his mother seems daily frustrated by the fact that he does not take care of himself. One day he locked her out of the house. She sat outside in her lawn chair talking to him through an open window. He eventually let her back in the house, but the through the window conversation centered around her son's need for privacy. In my head, I imagined that she had found his porn stash and so the battle ensued.
My neighbor across the street is single. She likes my flowers. She moved into the hood in May. She is close to my age, but still works. Her children and grandchildren visit her with great regularity as does a man about my age with Warren county plates on his cars. I imagine this is her brother. I further imagine that she is divorced, that her husband left her for a younger woman or man and that the bitterness of this has all passed. I also think she is a nurse....she just seems like a nurse to me.
Another neighbor across the street that moved in back in May spent a great deal of time remodeling the place before he took up residence. He's about 26 years old, seems to be in a security oriented occupation and carries a hand gun. He is a single father of a son not more than 4 years old. His son is currently not with him. I assume he went to spend the summer with Mom in some other place not close to Iowa. He also has regular visitors. Two young females will show up at his house, sometimes with a baby that's not quite 2 years old. Sometimes they will leave the baby with him. I believe that one of the young women is his sister and the other a friend of both and that he baby sits for them. From what I've seen he seems to be a good father and a good friend. I gave him my old lawn chairs and table for his front porch and told him he could use them until he found something he really wanted. He still has not replaced them.
He also has something close to a complete gym in his garage; weight machines, free weights and a heavy bag that I have seen him beat the crap out of on several occasions. It is my guess that he is ex-military, that he was never married to the mother of his son and that he may have met her while serving somewhere.
On my side of the street next door to the foster mother is a corner unit that was purchased and occupied in June. Two young men moved in and set up housekeeping. I immediately jumped to the conclusion that they were newlyweds buying their first house, but this may not be the case. One of them could be the owner renting space to a friend or they could be two straight single guys buying a house together and building equity rather than paying rent. The possibilities are endless and they seem entirely mismatched if they are a couple. They do things together, mainly bicycle riding and I have never seen them touch each other. One of them is about 6'4" and weighs about 190 lbs with black hair and a scruffy beard. I believe he is Asian, but it's hard to tell with his thick glasses. The other one is about 5'9" and weighs about 135 lb. He has no facial hair at all, is Caucasian and blond.
The blond has a personality and a sense of humor. He drives a black KIA Soul and was in the driveway washing it last night when I came home from Redfield. I asked him if it was a good idea to wash his Soul right out in the open like that and he started laughing and said that someone had to do it. I said that it must be hard to keep such a dark Soul clean. Again laughing, he said, 'who are you' to which I said, 'I'm your neighbor' and walked away to take my groceries inside. his roomate is a dullard by comparison, creepy quiet and Aspie like in his demeanor.
Next door to my security oriented neighbor lives an old lady. I say old. She's about my age. She lived there before I left and she was still there when I came back. We all believe she has a direct line to the home shopping network. UPS and USPS stop at her place almost daily with packages. She cannot park in her garage because it is stacked floor to ceiling with these boxes. I imagine that she is a hoarder. I envision her living space clogged with stacks of coveted items she never uses and well worn paths through the house for her and her two yappy dogs that seem to hate everyone except her. She has also been trying to get every one's voting proxies for HOA meetings without success. Not sure what she's up to there, but we may find out. I did not give her mine.
When I lived there before, I did not go to the HOA meetings because I was working. Now that I am retired, I may take an interest. It could well be time to overthrow the existing council and take over. It would be a good way to see if my assumptions about my neighbors are correct. It would also be a superior position from whence to watch my neighbors and interact with them. I kind of want this. We will see.
Friday, July 6, 2018
Skip's: A Restaurant Review
There's a group of single guys from church that I take a meal with every other week. There are usually 5 of us in attendance. It's a great time for a bit of fellowship and good food. We've become a sort of eating club, dining at area restaurants, but we have gotten in a bit of a rut because we eat at Skip's now almost all the time. There is a reason for that.
Skip's is located on Fleur Drive near the airport in what was once a house. For years before I ate there I thought it might be a funeral home. It definitely looks like one. Fortunately it's not. The food is good, moderately priced, something available for all pocketbooks, a comfortable and welcoming atmosphere and of course, our favorite waitress...Jodi. Jodi has been known to sit down and enjoy an adult beverage with us at the end of the evening. It's a nice personal touch and she is very conversational.
Back to the food. I have tried most of their beef entrees, their walleye and the lemon garlic shrimp over linguine. All were always cooked properly, very tasty and made fresh. The steaks are hand cut. They have something called a pork shank over rice that I have been tempted to try, but it has a bone in it. I hate paying for something I can't eat. Cod, tuna steak, tilapia and Salmon, all prepared in interesting ways, are also available. There is a wide range of chicken and pasta dishes too and tonight may be the night for Chicken Jalapeno or maybe Cavetelli. I'm not sure yet. My favorite sides to go with my entree are roasted asparagus and a salad. I have tried the rice pilaf. It was good, but not great. I am told that the garlic mashed potatoes are also a winner.
Appetizers. I like Skip's onion rings, I have had the Shrimp Diablo (shrimp sauteed in red pepper garlic butter) and it was excellent, but expensive. The other guys in the group enjoy the Bruschetta. I do not for reasons I will not go into except to say it has to do with me being a picky ass eater. I would like to try the Calamari and I might order that tonight with the onion rings. We always get the large order of onion rings since there are 5 of us. That might be too much for a smaller group. Think the half order.
Desserts. We do not always get dessert, but in the past I have tried their chocolate cake, key lime pie and also the creme brullet. All of them were excellent meal toppers, but my favorite was the key lime pie, both sweet and tart and very smooth.
They also have a nice, very efficient bar. Specialty drinks are available at a premium. I had a dreamsicle martini one night. It was $9.00. It was very good, but it was so not worth it. They make a good Moscow Mule if you like such things They also have all the popular and local craft beers and a short but good wine list. If you want to bring your own vino, you can. There is no corkage fee.
If there are drawbacks to Skip's or negatives, I would say they are minimal. They do not take reservations, so you might have to wait 30 or 40 minutes, unless you arrive early, between 5 and 6 PM. If the place is packed, the noise level can be high. It's also very dark inside, but I think that's more of a personal problem. No one else seems to mind.
So....Skip's gets a 4.5 star rating from me. I like it, but really guys, shouldn't we try some other places?
Skip's is located on Fleur Drive near the airport in what was once a house. For years before I ate there I thought it might be a funeral home. It definitely looks like one. Fortunately it's not. The food is good, moderately priced, something available for all pocketbooks, a comfortable and welcoming atmosphere and of course, our favorite waitress...Jodi. Jodi has been known to sit down and enjoy an adult beverage with us at the end of the evening. It's a nice personal touch and she is very conversational.
Back to the food. I have tried most of their beef entrees, their walleye and the lemon garlic shrimp over linguine. All were always cooked properly, very tasty and made fresh. The steaks are hand cut. They have something called a pork shank over rice that I have been tempted to try, but it has a bone in it. I hate paying for something I can't eat. Cod, tuna steak, tilapia and Salmon, all prepared in interesting ways, are also available. There is a wide range of chicken and pasta dishes too and tonight may be the night for Chicken Jalapeno or maybe Cavetelli. I'm not sure yet. My favorite sides to go with my entree are roasted asparagus and a salad. I have tried the rice pilaf. It was good, but not great. I am told that the garlic mashed potatoes are also a winner.
Appetizers. I like Skip's onion rings, I have had the Shrimp Diablo (shrimp sauteed in red pepper garlic butter) and it was excellent, but expensive. The other guys in the group enjoy the Bruschetta. I do not for reasons I will not go into except to say it has to do with me being a picky ass eater. I would like to try the Calamari and I might order that tonight with the onion rings. We always get the large order of onion rings since there are 5 of us. That might be too much for a smaller group. Think the half order.
Desserts. We do not always get dessert, but in the past I have tried their chocolate cake, key lime pie and also the creme brullet. All of them were excellent meal toppers, but my favorite was the key lime pie, both sweet and tart and very smooth.
They also have a nice, very efficient bar. Specialty drinks are available at a premium. I had a dreamsicle martini one night. It was $9.00. It was very good, but it was so not worth it. They make a good Moscow Mule if you like such things They also have all the popular and local craft beers and a short but good wine list. If you want to bring your own vino, you can. There is no corkage fee.
If there are drawbacks to Skip's or negatives, I would say they are minimal. They do not take reservations, so you might have to wait 30 or 40 minutes, unless you arrive early, between 5 and 6 PM. If the place is packed, the noise level can be high. It's also very dark inside, but I think that's more of a personal problem. No one else seems to mind.
So....Skip's gets a 4.5 star rating from me. I like it, but really guys, shouldn't we try some other places?
Wednesday, July 4, 2018
Queer Eye: More Than A Makeover---A Review
A couple of years ago, there was a TV show called "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy". There were 5 gay guys on the show that essentially taught straight guys how to dress and carry themselves in public.
I never watched it.
Right now, there is a spin off to that show on Netflix called "Queer Eye: More Than A Makeover". It is currently in its second season and I had not watched that show...until last night. I watched the first episode of season two and I have to admit, the show was very interesting for a number of reasons that I will get to in a minute, but first, I have to tell you this.
There is a blog that I visit several times a day called Your Other Brothers. The guys that write for the blog and run it are all same sex attracted Christian men that practice celibacy to remain obedient to Christ. The blog is a good place for people like me. I especially like the way they challenge us not to be afraid to love without falling in love or in lust. The approaches to this vary a great deal and many of the blog members and commenters discuss what's OK for them in the realm of SSA behavior. For instance, should SSA guys identify as gay? Is that too worldly? Can we or should we go to a same sex wedding? Are gay pride parades off the table? How do we deal with emotional dependency? Can we have side A friends? These guys talk about everything including porn and masturbation. They shy away from nothing. Everything is on the table and I believe it's a good thing in the end to support a venue such as this for gay Christian men. We need a place to discuss this stuff that would drive the average straight Christian from the room screaming, 'unclean, unclean'.
Anyhow, yesterday, one of the writers posted a story entitled, WHY I LIKE “QUEER EYE”. The writer was talking about the rebooted show on Netflix and his article became quite controversial. There were many reactions. Most of the guys under 40 years old had watched it and saw nothing wrong with it. There was some disagreement among us who are over 40 and more conservative in our opinions. I was originally on the fence, thinking this was a gray area like eating food sacrificed to idols, but then I decided to watch episode one of season two and, I thought the message was good.
The cast and crew of the show went to a very small town in Georgia called Gay. Yes, there is apparently such a place. They went there in response to a need brought to their attention by one of the members of the community. A small church of mostly African Americans was trying to complete a sort of community center for the town. The Queer Eye guys became involved in these efforts and they also became involved with the church and one specific family matriarch and her son in the church. Makeovers happened for both of them.
The underlying theme of the whole show seemed to be tolerance and acceptance; that even though there may not be agreement about what's moral and what is not, LGBT people and Christians can still get along and show love to each other and help each other. Some of the Queer eye guys had grown up in the church and had bad experiences. In Gay, Georgia they learned that Christianity can be a positive, loving faith. The church members learned that they needed to love everyone, even if you disagree with them in the hopes of winning them over. There were any number of good things on this particular episode. I am not sure about the other episodes and I will probably not watch them, but this one I can recommend to Christian friends interested in a life of peace and not conflict.
I never watched it.
Right now, there is a spin off to that show on Netflix called "Queer Eye: More Than A Makeover". It is currently in its second season and I had not watched that show...until last night. I watched the first episode of season two and I have to admit, the show was very interesting for a number of reasons that I will get to in a minute, but first, I have to tell you this.
There is a blog that I visit several times a day called Your Other Brothers. The guys that write for the blog and run it are all same sex attracted Christian men that practice celibacy to remain obedient to Christ. The blog is a good place for people like me. I especially like the way they challenge us not to be afraid to love without falling in love or in lust. The approaches to this vary a great deal and many of the blog members and commenters discuss what's OK for them in the realm of SSA behavior. For instance, should SSA guys identify as gay? Is that too worldly? Can we or should we go to a same sex wedding? Are gay pride parades off the table? How do we deal with emotional dependency? Can we have side A friends? These guys talk about everything including porn and masturbation. They shy away from nothing. Everything is on the table and I believe it's a good thing in the end to support a venue such as this for gay Christian men. We need a place to discuss this stuff that would drive the average straight Christian from the room screaming, 'unclean, unclean'.
Anyhow, yesterday, one of the writers posted a story entitled, WHY I LIKE “QUEER EYE”. The writer was talking about the rebooted show on Netflix and his article became quite controversial. There were many reactions. Most of the guys under 40 years old had watched it and saw nothing wrong with it. There was some disagreement among us who are over 40 and more conservative in our opinions. I was originally on the fence, thinking this was a gray area like eating food sacrificed to idols, but then I decided to watch episode one of season two and, I thought the message was good.
The cast and crew of the show went to a very small town in Georgia called Gay. Yes, there is apparently such a place. They went there in response to a need brought to their attention by one of the members of the community. A small church of mostly African Americans was trying to complete a sort of community center for the town. The Queer Eye guys became involved in these efforts and they also became involved with the church and one specific family matriarch and her son in the church. Makeovers happened for both of them.
The underlying theme of the whole show seemed to be tolerance and acceptance; that even though there may not be agreement about what's moral and what is not, LGBT people and Christians can still get along and show love to each other and help each other. Some of the Queer eye guys had grown up in the church and had bad experiences. In Gay, Georgia they learned that Christianity can be a positive, loving faith. The church members learned that they needed to love everyone, even if you disagree with them in the hopes of winning them over. There were any number of good things on this particular episode. I am not sure about the other episodes and I will probably not watch them, but this one I can recommend to Christian friends interested in a life of peace and not conflict.
Tuesday, July 3, 2018
Flowers
The flowers at my townhouse on the south side of Des Moines are looking rather spectacular. I think it's because of all the rain; 15 inches in the last two and a half weeks. So I thought I would post some pics. Here ya go.
You may have noticed that I have a predilection for impatiens, coleus, hostas and clematis. These are all plants and flowers that do well in shade or part shade environments. I gravitate to them because I have a northern exposure and also, I think they are beautiful. I particularly like the wide variety of coleus that is available. Their foliage is beautiful. Next year, it may be all that I put in. We will see.
You may have noticed that I have a predilection for impatiens, coleus, hostas and clematis. These are all plants and flowers that do well in shade or part shade environments. I gravitate to them because I have a northern exposure and also, I think they are beautiful. I particularly like the wide variety of coleus that is available. Their foliage is beautiful. Next year, it may be all that I put in. We will see.
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