Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Truth In Words and Art





Repentance Is Hard

Yesterday I told you of my sin against my brother and the fact that I have been behaving like a black hearted Pharisee. I told you about the advice I received from the Blacksmith as He swung His hammer to take out the impurities. I passed this advice to one and all. It is sound advice. It comes from the Blacksmith's Son.

"Deny yourself, take up your cross and follow Me."

Now the hard part. Applying it to myself.

I have to begin with repentance. There is no grace without repentance. At least that's what I believe. I have to turn from my sin and do what is right.

I apologize to my brother. I was cruel, mean spirited and vengeful deep within my soul. I took your actions personally and in ways that I should not have. I pissed myself off for no reason relevant to our struggles. And worst of all, I never said a word to you about it.

And this is where it gets even tougher. While I am sorry for mistreating you in my mind and before others, I still think the basic Biblical principles behind my anger and other misdirected emotions are correct. My interpretation of the scriptures does not allow me to lead the life you lead. I wanted to impose my version of truth on you. I wanted you to abandon your course and live as I do. I'm not sure I have the right to do that, even if you are a member of the same local body I belong to. It's something between you and God. He will be the last arbiter of our lives here and He will direct the grace where needed.

I can try to convince you of my point of view, but I do not believe that it is my right to force it on you. God gives us choices, right down to the choice of whether or not to believe in Him. He uses the processes of our lives to mold us and make us as He would have it be. To freeze a point in time and say, "knock it off", is to interfere in God's work in our lives. To offer another point of view for you to peruse as you move forward is God's work. I was not doing God's work. I was being punitive, spiteful and even jealous.

I am sorry.

I am jealous of the freedoms you take for yourself. They are things that I regard as sin. Sin is offensive to me, hence my overreaction. But since we never had the opportunity to talk about it, I will never know your point of view and you will never know mine. I have created an unfortunate situation for both of us. Again, I am sorry.

I realize, at this point, that all this may mean nothing to you. Just more conservative rubbish. Believe what you like, but I have been there and done that myself. I do understand.

I guess I never did understand why we did not connect after I outed myself last year. And I still don't understand why you remained in the closet when you were out everywhere else. It is a mystery to me. The door was opened and I was the only one at church that walked out of the closet.

You and I are not the only ones. There are others. We need them to stand up and be counted no matter which side of the fence they are on - yours or mine.

Brother, there is always room and time to change your heart and mind. I am trying to soften my heart. It has been made sore by life and events beyond my control. I am not offering an excuse here as much as an observation.

I hope you can forgive me.  

Monday, November 28, 2016

The Anvil Of His Grace

There is a place in the Arabian desert that T. E. Lawrence called the Anvil of God. In Arab legend it was the place of intense heat where God took men to bend them to His will.

I can testify that God does have an anvil. He is the Blacksmith of heaven, bending the souls of men to His will, wielding His hammer without mercy in an effort to save us. It is contradictory in the human sense, but He thinks nothing of killing us to save us. He knows that we have to die before we can really live. Sometimes He manages to kill the rebellion in us so that we live this life for Him. Other times, the flesh must die so that we can live. His loving intentions will be born out in the eternal lives of those He saves.

There are times in this life where we of faith can look back and see how He has formed us and shaped us in His Forge and pounded out something beautiful from the cheapest metals of our lives. Then there are those days when we know He is not done with us. He grasps us with His tongs and plunges us back into the fire for one more bout of refinement, one more pounding of His holy hammer.  

I discovered yesterday that I still have a hard heart. I felt like the older brother in the story of the prodigal. I was angry, resentful and vengeful. I wanted to call down fire on my brother even as others were rushing around to rescue him. My well of human grace and kindness was dry. I had nothing to offer but bitter anger at how he has disrespected me, my testimony, my faith and even the sacrifice I brought to the Lord.

I did not have a clue about any of this until others tried to make his problem my problem. I knew I had a lingering jealousy of this individual. I knew I was coveting the self willed life he is currently enjoying. But in the night and while I slept, the Blacksmith of heaven did His work. In the midst of fire and blazing heat, His hammer came down and split the hot metal of my soul. The impurities flowed out and then I knew.

I am guilty of self righteous resentment, hate and anger toward my brother. Even now I just want to let him drown in his sin. My hand is not forthcoming. I do not wish to pull him back into the boat. And part of this is because he is not reaching out for help. If someone is to help save him, it will be against his will. My thought is that he needs to struggle some more. And so I cross my arms and let him drift away while he tries to breath sea water. So be it.

Really? Is this the way I am? Apparently so.

Whatever... It is good I did not join the rescue efforts. It is good that I did not involve myself, given the abject poverty of my attitude and hardness of heart. It was thought by some that I could empathize. I can. I understand exactly how he feels. I understand exactly what he wants and the only -  the only advice I have for him is what the Blacksmith gave me as His hammer came down on my soul.

"Deny yourself, take up your cross and follow Me."


Thursday, November 24, 2016

Thanksgiving

Well, it's Thanksgiving Day again. I have much to be thankful for, though I try not to reserve my thanks to one day a year. The One who made me is faithful to see to my needs and make my life work. There is something of a miracle there. You have no idea.

Anyway, I just want to tell family, friends and fellow Christ followers how much I love you. Without y'all in my life, much would be missing and the material things would seem useless.

To the Angels, Rhonda, Karla, Billie and, yes Brenda and Patty too, thanks so much for taking the time. I know I am an acquired taste. Thanks so much for coming along side me in my walk. We are an interesting and eclectic group.

To Eric Lang who was the first Christian brother to share my burden, Thanks so much for your efforts and continuing friendship. You are a very patient man. The love of Christ flows from your fingertips. Sometimes it's a bit snippy, but I both need and appreciate that. I love you man! Have you forgotten about the day I told you? I was house sitting for the parents. I invited you over. We sat on the deck and I told you I was gay. As I recall, you laughed at me. Your reaction was great...really it was. From my point of view, it could have been way worse. Even so, you continued to be my friend. Your continued love and support gave me the encouragement I needed to trust others with the information. And eventually I did. In many ways, you became my first accountability partner. Thanks for the Love Buddy!

Remind me to put you in the will....

To family on both sides, let me just say I love you and thanks so much for letting me continue to be your nephew or cousin.

To my church...I love you all too. Thanks for letting me teach for 17 years. It helps fill the hole in my soul and it keeps me in the Word. I also love the exchange of knowledge and the mutual celebration of our salvation. We are truly new creations. We are no longer what we once were. We have been empowered to fight back by the One that shares His Spirit with us. Victory is ours and time is on our side. Nothing can separate us from His love.

I hope you all have a good day. If you're with family, steer clear of politics and focus on the end game. We have a glorious future ahead and it will last forever.

To Him Who Loves And Saves us be the glory, honor and power! Maranatha!  

Sunday, November 20, 2016

It's Gonna Be One Of Those Days...

Well, it's Sunday. Dad did not want to get into the shower and, man, did he need one. He said he did not feel like going to church, that he did not stink and that he was not going to take a shower.

Sheesh. He is 80 not 4. I'm thinking it's the Alzheimer's. He is like stage 6 out of 7. Where he is at in stage 6 is the question, but if last night is any indicator, he is getting close to 7.

He came down to my man cave with the dog last night after watching a TV show about computer fraud upstairs. He thought the whole thing had been real and that the people on the TV had been in the living room. He was all concerned about computer security and he was trying to call someone where he worked 17 years ago (and all of his adult life prior) to warn them. When I explained that it was a TV show, that it was not real and there was no one in the house, he wanted to know when they left. Once I got that in his head, he told me he wanted to get in his car and go home. I told him he was already home and that he had lived there since 1986. This was astounding news along with his retirement 17 years prior.

I finally got him sat back down and I changed the TV channel to a college football game. He settled down and dozed off. I went to bed and then woke this morning to his subtle refusal to go to church or even shower.

I'm not sure why Satan pushes him like this on Saturday nights. I know that when I pray about his craziness and ask God to drive Satan away, the 'sundowning' behavior always diminishes. For me, it's kind of a miracle actually. I praise God's name daily for what He does for my Dad.

Even so, it is feeling more and more like I am going to have to give someone else control of this situation. A retirement facility with an Alzheimer's unit may be required. I'm not sure how much longer I can do this. He is frustrated, and I am not getting any younger myself. I can barely lift him when he falls now. I know I will not be able to do it when I'm 65. I worry about leaving him alone in the house, even with a nurse. He can be a difficult, belligerent bully.  And I am just as bad...

I think he needs to be in a place with a staff that can cope with him. I know that once he is out of his home environment, he will not do as well, but he should not be there in his present state.

It's going to be a rough holiday season.

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Are You Eating Right?

Our diets can determine many things about us. A diet high in carbs can make us fat. It can make us insulin resistant. We do not properly metabolize the food we eat and it ends up stored by our bodies in the form of fat around our middles and chins. It can be a problem in a fast food culture. What we take into our bodies says much about what our bodies become. It can even effect how long we live and what kind of physical health we enjoy.

We need to eat to live and not live to eat. Food can replace many things in our lives. It can provide comfort; that feeling of fullness in the belly is much like feeling loved. And so we eat to feel better. We eat when we are not hungry and we eat things that are not really good for our bodies. Our six packs become kegs and our arteries clog and we wonder why we feel bad.

Much of it has to do with what's going on in our heads. If we are needy mentally and spiritually, we do what we need to to do to feel better in our heads by satisfying our stomachs. It works in the short term. We feel better. We feel satiated. But that feeling does not last long and we soon need to be fed again to recapture that sense of fullness and satisfaction. It's the same thing that is at work in the alcoholic and the drug addict and even the nicotine addict, but with a subtle difference. We have to eat. We will die if we do not eat. And so I say again, Eat to live. Do not live to eat.

It's odd how our mental and spiritual well being is tied to our physical well being in this way. It says that most of America is not only overweight, they are unhappy and unsatisfied. And that brings me to the most uncomfortable conclusion of all...

Church, You are fat. What is it you have been consuming? Do you know why you do it? Whatever 'it' is? You need to be eating better. You need to get your mind and spirit right. Set the muffin down and back away from the table. There is a carrot stick over here with your name on it. In the meantime, let me suggest you feed your soul a bit better. Then maybe some cupcakes will not seem so appealing. For a people that are supposed to be the model of self control, y'all are a mess. So brush the cookie crumbs off your chest, get up and get some spiritual exercise. Jesus had just the menu plan for you.

John 6:53-59
 53 Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54 Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. 55 For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. 56 Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in them. 57 Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. 58 This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your ancestors ate manna and died, but whoever feeds on this bread will live forever.” 59 He said this while teaching in the synagogue in Capernaum.

Jesus' menu plan did not sit well with the folks of His day, but this is what He had to say to them. They were seeing cannibalism and vampiric behavior. They seemed to be taking Him literally when He was speaking metaphorically. In our day, many Christians react the same way. While they might see symbolism here, what they see is a foreshadowing of the Lord's Supper. This is also incorrect. The Lord's Supper does not bring eternal life. It is a 'remembrance' feast.

No, Jesus was speaking metaphorically here. It was His desire that we take in His very essence into ourselves, that we become who He is as much as possible. He wants us to incorporate His being and character into ourselves. If we do that, we will lose the spiritual fat. If we do that, we will find contentment spiritually and mentally and that will translate to healthier physical bodies. We will not have this nagging, undefined need to take in or eat things that are not good for us, even when we are not really hungry.

He is the Bread of Life and He's low carb, so eat as much as you want. Let's dig in.      

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

The Limp in My Soul

I have been accused of not studying the Old Testament. And it's true that I do not spend much time there these days. In the past however, I was there almost exclusively. I probably could have been a Pharisee. The stories of the Patriarchs, and later Moses and Joshua, are riveting and they point to the One that I love that came in the fullness of time to save me. It helps me to put His whole story together, so I am thankful for my legalist days. It gives me an appreciation for the age of grace.

One of my favorite characters in the book of Genesis is Jacob, son of Isaac. He was a smart man. He was also a calculating plotter that had a knack for making things work out to his advantage. He was not someone you would think of as submitted to God, at least in the early years of his life. Later though, he had no choice. If Jacob was to survive, he had to bend his will to the Lord God. Their's was a rough and tumble relationship where learning came with life's losses and gains and a father-in-law that was smarter than he.  Jacob learned to bend like a reed in the wind of God's instruction. It all worked out very well. The errors of his early life, though they worried him, never came back to haunt him as he thought they would. He passed from this world as the father of a burgeoning nation in the incubator of Egypt. It was his family that became God's first people and the gene pool for the Savior of the world. Jacob had become an important man in God's plan, before he died. He was a man that dared to wrestle with God.

My favorite story about Jacob concerns his return to Canaan from the land of his uncle and father-in-law, Laban. After he had safely sent all his family and herds across the the river Jabbok and into Canaan, Jacob went back to the other side to spend the night. He was worried about a number of things including the reaction of his brother Esau to his return home. Moses explains it this way in Genesis 32:22-32.

 22 That night Jacob got up and took his two wives, his two female servants and his eleven sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. 23 After he had sent them across the stream, he sent over all his possessions. 24 So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. 25 When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. 26 Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” 27 The man asked him, “What is your name?” “Jacob,” he answered. 28 Then the man said, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.” 29 Jacob said, “Please tell me your name.” But he replied, “Why do you ask my name?” Then he blessed him there. 30 So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, “It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared.” 31 The sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip. 32 Therefore to this day the Israelites do not eat the tendon attached to the socket of the hip, because the socket of Jacob’s hip was touched near the tendon.

My soul is disabled. I limp. I need a spiritual crutch just to get around. Strangely, I seem to get things done, even when the hip of my soul aches with the pain of my spiritual old age and a lifetime of fighting the battle. It reminds me how the Lover of my soul cares for me. He has to. He is the one that gave me the limp. We wrestle a lot. He can be kind of rough. Even so, I enjoy it. I always did like to be man handled. If you want to know who wins these wrestling matches, I would have to say we both win. He always prevails in the end, but the things I learn enable me to prevail in life. He enables me to cross the Jabock daily and encounter the Esaus of my life. He turns the messes in my life to blessings. even so, we wrestle. He seems to enjoy correcting my self willed plans...replacing it with His. I love Him.

We wrestled just last night. The bed clothes were a mess; damp with my sweat. I had been dreaming that someone was at the foot of the bed slowly removing the sheet that covered me. I could not see whoever it was, but I felt a presence. It scared me to the point of waking. It was 3 AM and do you think I could go back to sleep? So I laid there staring at the ceiling trying to convince myself that it was just a dream. We talked. I prayed for someone that has been on my mind...someone that has the same limp that I have.

This one I prayed for seems to be walking in error and looking to all the wrong people to help him get around. He does not see his limp as a disability that requires dependence on God. He seems to be proud of his limp, willing to indulge it, even as he falls down. I do not know this fellow traveler well, but I am sensing pressure from my wrestling partner to talk to him about his disability. It's doubtful that he will listen to an old man with similar life experience, even so I am feeling compelled to act.

Who am I to do this Lord? You could do this in some other way. There is no relationship on which to base what I would say to him. He needs your intervention Lord. Yes, I know I could create a relationship. How long would that take? And is it already too late for that? I am not the only one that sees his limp. It has been obvious to all in attention and yet none of your other servants stepped up to help. Ya, I'm passing the buck. I'm not seeing a hopeful situation here. He has no reason to listen to me. And he is tired of trying to walk alone. Can you at least show him your presence? In the meantime, let me think. I am not smart like your servant Jacob, but I'm not stupid either. I will use the things you give me to help. I will need some words...I will wait. I need to know for sure too...should I do this. And please let me get some rest tonight. I'm tired.
         

Monday, November 14, 2016

On Being In Love - A Spiritual Experience

As we all know, the Christian Church has many proscriptions against what is considered ungodly behavior. The behaviors run the gambit of what might be considered (at least occasionally) normal behavior for non-Christian people. And yes, there are times when lovers of Christ fall into these behaviors. Sometimes it is purposeful and sometimes the events of life bring us to a point where we do what we know is wrong, what we've been taught is wrong, because we are driven by desire and personal need which, while wholly unchristian, seems to be part of who we are. We rationalize the behavior. We say, 'this is the way God made me' and why can I not do whatever it is since it hurts no one and I want it.'

Paul, who was an apostle of Jesus Christ, laid down much of what we call Christian morality in the New Testament. Evangelical Christians believe that what he wrote was inspired by God. It was God breathed, it came from a higher authority - the Creator of The Universe and Father of Jesus Christ. And so, it is with great reverence that we believers consider the words of Paul in our efforts to be obedient to the will of Him who gave His life for us.

In other words, It's a big deal! Got that? We respect what God laid down through His apostles and prophets and through the Living Word of His Son. We revere it. It is important to us. We try very hard to live within those bounds. At least until we are faced with the paradox of what we are in the flesh and who we should be in Jesus Christ.

I understand this conflict in ways that maybe other Christians do not. The urge to sin is present in the flesh of all of us that believe, but sometimes, just sometimes, our most primal urges are affected by this corruption and what is ungodly and abnormal seems hard wired in us and natural, even when it goes against nature and the created order.

This has been the battleground of my life. From an early age, I knew I was bent in a very sexual way. I have known from the time I was 13 years old, that I found men physically, sexually and personally attractive. When the other guys pined for a girl friend, I wanted to share myself and my life with a boyfriend. I wanted intimacy at every level with a male companion.

Having grown up and grown into Christianity, I also knew it was wrong. God and the Scriptures have a very narrow definition of what human sexuality and godly interpersonal relationships should look like. God ordained through scripture that marriage and human sexuality were holy only when it is between one man and one woman. Sexuality outside of these bounds is considered immoral, wicked and ungodly.

As a Christian and a believer, this created a contradiction in my life and a gaping chasm in my relationship with my Lord. It made me angry, rebellious and hateful toward Him...Him who loves me more than anyone. I demanded to know why He had made me this way, why He insisted that what seems so natural to me is also wrong. The pain of this fight separated us for years. In my early twenties, I had a relationship with a young man of similar age more out of rage at God than love of the young man. I think I was trying to punish God for permanently trapping me in this bent flesh. Whatever it was, I was not happy and it created a tenuous, bumpy and angry relationship between Him and me. I had grown up as a bit of a legalist. I did not understand His grace and unconditional love in the proper context. And so it made all the spiritual issues much worse. I went through years of depression and pain, but after my college boyfriend, there was never another man in my life. In my spite, I told the Lord I would never do it again unless someone showed up in my life and chose me. I would never again pursue another man in this way.

God works in strange ways...yes He does. Though we did not talk much until about 1997, He placed a man in my way. It was someone that I thought I already knew. As it turned out, I did not know Him at all.

The man was His Son Jesus Christ.

I never really knew Him and we are still exploring each other together, but it is the only relationship I have ever had that has brought me any peace. I have fallen in love with Him. I cannot live without Him. And since He is the jealous type, I do not 'step out' on Him. He knows I have a wandering eye, but He seems to recapture my attention at just the right time to make me realize just how much I love Him. He does this by loving me. That is much tougher to do than you might think. It also makes me feel special. Only an act of the Most High God could bring me around and I did not have to get blinded like Paul.

Jesus is the most amazing man I have ever met. He can even make the straight boys submit to His will. He is My God and the lover of my soul.

This has been my lifetime spiritual experience. My life is not over yet. Probably soon, but not yet. It's my desire to be with Him until the day I die. Even so, I still see the possibility that another 'Mr. Right' might grace my life in a very physical way. I guess what I'm saying is that there is still time for me to mess this up.

I'm thinking my Man will not let this happen. So if I suddenly drop dead, you will know it was my jealous boyfriend bringing me home. I love Him.            

Friday, November 11, 2016

Church Discipline and Agape Love

What makes for a healthy church? Are there any? Do all local bodies have their issues that need to be overcome? Probably. To one extent or another, there is always room for improvement. The spirituality of a local congregation is a major factor in the health of a church. Does your church walk in the spirit? Do they seek Christ and His righteousness? Do they long to know Him in ways they have never known Him before?

And what about knowledge? Where is your congregation at with regard to knowledge of God's will as revealed in scripture? Does that knowledge translate to faith motivated action? Does the membership of your local body really know each other and work together, pursuing each other as they pursue Christ together? Does knowledge of scripture inspire your church to love in that very Christian and agape sense.

Lots of questions here. Do I have any answers? Left to myself, probably not, but if I read the New Testament, I get an idea of what should be...what must be...if a church is to be healthy.

The apostle Paul was a letter writer. The New Testament is mostly made of of his letters to the churches that he helped to plant. Chances are good that if your church got a letter from Paul, there was a problem or problems there. So in the pursuit of church health, Paul would send letters advising what to do about issues of the time.

The Corinthian church was no exception. It had problems. It was not a healthy place. Even so, Paul did not give up on them. He addressed their issues in his first letter to them and he was very direct in his approach. It was a divisive church. People tended to group together according to who they were first taught by. They abused spiritual gifts, allowing some to dominate and bring disorder to their worship. They would not share with those of the congregation in need and they really did not have a good understanding of how to celebrate the Lord's Supper in the proper New Testament spirit.  They also tolerated open sin by certain members. This was made worse by the pride they had in their tolerance.

Beyond all that however, their worst problem was that Christian love did not temper everything they did in their pursuit of Christ and their salvation. They were clannish, cliquish and self centered; more interested in their importance and rank in the church than the welfare of their brethren. It was a mess of pride and opportunism that did not fit the model of what a church should be.

Let me ask you something. How well do you know your brothers and sisters in Christ? So you have relationship with them or are they mere acquaintances?  Do you know and love them well enough that you would be comfortable addressing personal behaviors with them, even sin that might not be good for them? What about you? Are there people in your church that you love and respect and would listen to if they were pointing out your sin and bad behavior urging you to repent?

You see, pride gets in the way of that kind of interaction in most churches. Sometimes it is a lack of knowledge about what is sin or it's our desire to avoid feeling judgmental or judged. There is also a misunderstanding of what Christian love is...because it is not judgmental or self righteous. The motivation of Christian love should always be to restore, to build, to improve upon whatever foundation was laid. It wants the very best for each of us including the death of what once was to enable the growth of what Christ wants us to become. We should be helping each other in love and not lording it over each other in self righteousness. Love and relationship determine the effectiveness and even the possibility of a successful discussion in this realm. 

Does your church do love right?

If we do not do love right, if we do not do relationships right, then how can we do church discipline right?  

I think what we find in both ancient and modern churches is that if the love is not there, not much else works well. If we do not know and care about each other and our spiritual health, the church just becomes another shallow social group; The Elks or the Lyons Club. You get my drift here.

I  Corinthians 13
   
13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

You see, none of what we do in church matters without love and relationship among the members of the local body. None of it will be understood without love. Intention and context is everything. If I do not have love and relationship with someone, should I be advising them about how to live? How will it be perceived if all I know about them is what I heard or read elsewhere?

And if I do have a relationship with them, a loving Christian relationship with them, do I not have an obligation to them to help them with their spiritual needs? Not the preacher, not the elder, but me?

Ya, I think so. 

We often wonder why we Christians do not live consistent with the things we believe. Could it be that we tolerate that situation so that we do not have to do the heavy lifting that goes with Christian love and relationship? We see Brother Bob's car in the parking lot of the strip club, but we say nothing to him because we do not know him all that well and we do not want to seem all judgmental. So instead we tell someone else, a church leader or pastor. We want them to do the heavy lifting. We do not want to be involved. What happens after that can be a calamity. Brother Bob ends up feeling condemned and punished, but not loved.

We have to be careful. Brother Bob may simply end up at another church. But the absolute worse thing is when Brother Bob throws in the towel and does not go to church at all because what little relationship he had with Jesus and the truth was destroyed by the punitive, judgmental actions of his church.

Do we love Bob or do we just want him to knock it off?

We need to love each other, consider the circumstances and try to help each other in love. 

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Do I Know You?

Sometimes we Christians just don't see things. We are deliberately blind because seeing would kill our Jesus buzz.  Obvious problems are ignored because their roots are so deep and rooted in decades of a 'move along, there's nothing to see here' attitude; or, 'let's ignore this until it becomes a public, church-wide problem'. This kind of thing happens in evangelical churches all the time. We fail to help someone because we are so caught up in our own personal realities or we do not want to get involved or we think it's none of our business. That is, until whatever it is becomes a problem for everyone.

As the Black Crowes en-tuned all those years ago, "I Am Seeing Things For the First Time..."

When someone belongs to a church and they are what you call a lifer, meaning they have been there since infancy, you would think that the other members would know them, really know them, be involved in their life in sharing of personal issues and personal problems. Indeed, you would think that churches in general should function this way as the Body of Christ on Earth.

But no..we do not. We tend to treat each others' symptoms, but we never work on the disease. We do not want to step up and step out to help. It's not comfortable. Giving our Christian neighbor a leg up when he or she needs one is not always a spiritually uplifting experience. It can be tough and messy, especially if our help is not immediately desired. And so we hire professionals to do this for us. The pro may not have the same intimate connection with the brother or sister in question, but we want them to clean up the mess so we do not have to. We report spiritual issues to them and think it is not our responsibility to talk to whoever about whatever.

I would submit that this is the wrong approach. Do we not owe it to each other to minister to each other and see to one another's needs no matter how difficult and daunting those needs might be?

We need to be a kingdom of priests in ministry to each other and not sheep all nursing at the teat of the local professional God Botherer.

So how am I doing this? How am I modeling this fantabulous plan of mine to heal all the ills of the local church and model what I think is right?

I am doing nothing. Yes, that's right. I'm right there with the other lambys trying to get my spiritual handout and telling on the other lambs that bother me in my pursuit of a meal.

So how do we break this cycle? By breaking it.

I do not know my brothers and sisters all that well. I always assumed they did not want to know me all that well, so I never burdened them with who I really am until about a year ago. It went pretty well. I did not get thrown out, but only a few check on me to see if I'm having any difficulty in my walk with Jesus. And really, it only takes a few.

I guess my point is that we do not know each other all that well and I wonder if we really do want to know each other. Why do we fear this? Why do we want to keep our worms in a can off stage on Sunday so no one can see them? If there are worms, people need to go fishing. Just my thought.

It was suggested yesterday that I start by taking someone to lunch.

Who wants to go to lunch? I will buy.  You will have to talk. It takes me awhile to get warmed up.

So...

Are we seeing each other through a mirror darkly or are we seeing each other face to face?

It is what we make it. Right? 

  

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Don't Be A Hater

"Don't be a hater."

You've heard that expression right? I find I agree with it for the most part, but in our culture it has come to mean things that I hate :^)))

Yes, I know. Sounds contradictory. Even so, the use of the phrase has come to mean that because we disagree with someone or we disagree with the way they choose to live, that we hate them.

Again, I hate that.

It is possible for me to love you and want the very best for you and still be at odds with your behavior and even the lifestyle you choose?

I do not think I hate anybody. I hate sin. I hate my own sin. I would like to leave it to you to hate your own sin, but if I am not aware of mine or choose to ignore it, what are your options?

If I am your brother in Christ and I am in a state of open rebellion against what is in scripture, you have an obligation to me to make me aware of what I am so obviously ignoring. You would not do this because you hate me. Quite the contrary, you would do it because you love me.

If you have children, let me ask you, do you ever disagree with their behavior? Do you discipline them? Is it because you hate them or because you love them?

I'm thinking your motivation is love here, but in today's culture, a choice to sin is simply a choice and if you don't like it, then you must be a hater. Right?

Prisons are full of people that never received proper doses of loving discipline from the people that loved them. Just sayin'...

You see. Love is doing the best thing for the one you love at the the time they need it most. Sometimes that involves discipline, training, coaching or whatever else you want to call it.

Hebrews 12:4-13

 
In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says,
“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline,
    and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
because the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
    and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.”[a]
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! 10 They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
12 Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. 13 “Make level paths for your feet,”[b] so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.

We all need some guidance, sometimes even a "time out", to think about our course in this life and where we really want to go with our faith. God and our brethren can guide us and help us or we can live the way we want to our own detriment, both now and in the eternal sense. None of it means that God hates us or our brethren hate us.

To the contrary, it means they love us more than we might at first realize and that love is motivated by something more holy than any of us.

So...don't be a hater...care enough to look out for the spiritual welfare of your brothers and sisters in Christ, even when they do not care. If they think you are a hater, so be it. The day may come when they will think otherwise. This life ain't over until the heart stops. Change happens. 

Monday, November 7, 2016

Chruch Discipline Redux

Last week I wrote a lengthy post on church discipline. It was intended as a sort of 'how to' guide. What I was not clear about is when it should be used and who should oversee and administer such spiritual guidance.

Let me say here at the beginning that the procedures outlined by Jesus in Matthew 18 and the events in Corinth described by Paul in I Corinthians 5 should be our last resort in pursuit of church discipline. When there is no where else to go with an unrepentant church member, only then do we go here. These passages MUST NOT be used a a basis for witch hunts. "Jane Christian is wearing her skirts way too short. It's time to give her a warning"; we need to avoid going 'judicial' in situations like this. There are other ways such things can be handled.

So what does merit a round of church discipline? Yes, a good question. As I said in a recent post, open, blatant, habitual public sin that is in clear violation of New Testament standards would be enough to set the wheels of church discipline into motion.

And who decides what violations to pursue? Another good question. According to Jesus, it should be the offended person, the witness to the sin or the one sinned against. If this fails to turn the sinner away from their self destructive path, then others must be involved up to and including the congregation. Indeed, the accused may want such a public venue to clear their name. In no place does Jesus or Paul mention the involvement of church leadership. This is a matter to be settled among those in dispute or those offended or those sinned against by a brother.

There are many variables here. Suppose the accuser has been less than forthcoming about how the offense occurred; or the accuser has an axe to grind with the accused. This is a possibility. What if they are in competition for a leadership position in the church and they are vying for the same job? You see what I am saying? The entire background of the situation surrounding the offense must be brought to light. This may be something that one or both of them might like to avoid.

Then there is the whole "your sin is worse than mine and you have to go" drama. Or "yes, I know Jim and Dorthy are involved in similar activity, but the circumstances are different and more understandable".

We just cannot go there. It's an abuse of the procedures laid down by the Lord.

Finally, the discipline procedures laid down by Jesus MUST NOT be used by church leadership to start a witch hunt against anyone that may disagree with their policies. "Joe Christian is taking issue with our plans. Lets research his personal life and background and internet presence and see if there is anything there we can use to destroy him and remove him from the church."

NO>>>NO>>>NO

Any church leadership that is willing to go there should receive fire from heaven.

These procedures are extreme measures intended for extreme situations. They are not to be used until every other option has been exhausted. Period.

If you want your church to be a place of transparency where people can open up and be themselves and get help with their sin issues, their life issues, their marriage issues and family issues, then a heavy handed or biased use of such church discipline is not advisable. It will shut down transparency faster than a mud pie on a picture window. If people believe they are going to be prosecuted instead of helped, they will not only shut down...they will move elsewhere.

These things need to be considered when using church discipline policy.

1. Gravity of the sin of the accused.
2. The character of the accused and of the accuser.
3. Hidden motivations of all parties involved.
4. Relevance. Has anyone in the church at anytime previous ever been concerned about the behavior of the accused individual? If not, why now? What motivation is their for concern at this time by anyone?
 5. Consistent, fair application of the church discipline policy for everyone and not just those with sins that are more irritating, offensive or odd than those presented by the status quo.

If the policy cannot be used without abuse or bias or absolute clarity concerning the facts, it must not be used at all.          

Friday, November 4, 2016

Church Discipline Done With Mercy and Grace

This is a tough subject, particularly in the 21st Century, but it does not have to be a merciless, cold and graceless process. In scripture, there are procedures handed down to us from Jesus and Paul that outline what must be done when and errant church member refuses to admit and repent of his (or her) open sin. Perhaps I should define open sin?

I think 'open sin' is when the Christian sinner is very public about his actions, thinks there is nothing wrong with what he is doing and disagrees with those that try to point out his error, continuing in rebellion against God and church leadership and refusing to turn away from the sin and repent. You may have noticed that I used the phrase 'Christian sinner'. Yes, Christians are sinners too. We are sinners saved by the grace and love of Jesus Christ, but we do sin and we admit such regularly. We have to. We are called to confess our error when we fail and sometimes in a public fashion before the church or at least, specific brethren, but most definitely before God in prayer. Repentance from sin is a requirement of the Christian life when we fall into it.

For the Christian though, it should be easy to identify the times when we fail. As we grow spiritually, we become more sanctified and less likely to become mired in serious sin. That's the way it's supposed to work. We have been born again spiritually. Our bodies, however, are still an issue. We live in corrupt flesh that is weak and works against the Christian in his or her pursuit of holiness. Our bodies and brains want things that are not necessarily good for us spiritually. And so it goes.

We can fall into addiction traps. Our physical bodies become addicted to anger, greed, malice, sexual immorality, laziness, gluttony, drug abuse, porn, drunkenness and the list goes on and on. For the Christian, our flesh can work against our spiritual pursuits. The result can be a God centered resistance to the desires of the flesh or failure in the battle. Sometimes the failure can persist so long that the Christian will find ways to rationalize the sinful behavior. The behavior becomes regular public practice and the sin is no longer sinful to the mind of the believer involved. The sin hardens the heart of the believer, then the promptings of the Holy Spirit to stop the behavior are no longer felt by him.

When the sinful behavior reaches the point where it is open, public and unrepented, it becomes the duty of the Church to act to save their failing brother or sister from themselves and also make sure the sin does not infect the remaining members of the local body. This is where it can get dicey and I think it's why we were given procedures by Jesus Himself, as well as Paul for situations like this.

In the gospel of Matthew, chapter 18, Jesus tells us this:

  15 “If your brother or sister[b] sins,[c] go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’[d] 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector."

Jesus makes it sound too easy perhaps. Pointing out someone else's sin to them is difficult and painful for everyone involved. The one doing the pointing knows he sins and so can sympathize with the perpetrator. If done correctly and with love, it can be a positive encounter between brethren ending in prayer and repentance. There is no place for self-righteousness in any step of this process. We are only made righteous by the blood of Christ. It is to that sacrifice that we must appeal when we repent. This is where we want the one in open sin to turn.

Sometimes more is required. The habitual sinner may refuse to recognize the problem and may even feel justified in the behavior. "It seems normal and natural to me" or "I like it, it's not hurting anyone except maybe me" might be offered as reasons for refusal to repent, or to change the behavior. At this point, an intervention of sorts is required. A small group of brethren should attend to the one in error to help the sinner see his fault. Again, this has to be done with love and grace. the purpose is not to condemn, but to save. There is also a need for witnesses to the testimony of the habitual sinner, so two or three people should be in the group when they approach the errant believer the second time.

Once the one in sin has testified to his point of view about the behavior and it has been determined that no progress was made in convincing him to repent, then the matter must be taken before the whole church. I do not know that this would be considered a trial as much as it would be one last ditch effort to convince the sinner of his error. Again, love and prayer would need to be applied in this process as well as attempts to convince the one in sin that he must repent. If this fails, then the instructions are clear about what must follow.

Disfellowship. Excommunication.

Until the errant believer repents, he cannot be a part of the Body. It is incumbent on the leadership of the local church to protect the body from the contamination of the open sin practiced by the one in error. Continued presence of the offender will say to the membership that sin is not taken seriously or that the behavior must be OK for 'me' since 'Joe' is still here and he does that stuff all the time.

Do you see what I'm saying? I think you do.

Paul actually practiced a form of this procedure. If you examine I Corinthians 5, you will find there was a man in that church that was engaging in sexual activity with his father's wife. Paul was mortified that the Corinthians had continued to fellowship with this man and that they seemed proud of how tolerant they had been toward him and his sin. Let's look at the chapter:
         
It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that even pagans do not tolerate: A man is sleeping with his father’s wife. And you are proud! Shouldn’t you rather have gone into mourning and have put out of your fellowship the man who has been doing this? For my part, even though I am not physically present, I am with you in spirit. As one who is present with you in this way, I have already passed judgment in the name of our Lord Jesus on the one who has been doing this. So when you are assembled and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh,[a][b] so that his spirit may be saved on the day of the Lord.
Your boasting is not good. Don’t you know that a little yeast leavens the whole batch of dough? Get rid of the old yeast, so that you may be a new unleavened batch—as you really are. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. Therefore let us keep the Festival, not with the old bread leavened with malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.
I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— 10 not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. 11 But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister[c] but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people.
12 What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? 13 God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.”

Paul had a problem with open, unrepented sin in the church and he also did not have any appreciation for the apparent tolerance of the congregation. It was all just wrong, wrong, wrong.

Can you imagine practicing this form of church discipline today? You should be able to imagine it and your church should be practicing it. It is necessary for the health of the Body and it is necessary if there is any hope of saving the one in error. 

Today though, we tend to stay out of each other's business. We do not like the discomfort of a public discussion or even a 'one on one' discussion of what might be eating away at our hope for eternal life. It's doubly hard to practice this kind of church discipline when we all know we sin and the confrontation of this one errant Christian in public just might expose us of whatever. And that may be the point of it.

We do not want to be quick to accuse others and we do not want to get our own selves caught up in the process. The motivation to do what is right as much as is possible can be strengthened by the desire to avoid such procedures.

As for the one that gets expelled from the body, well...it's never too late for them to repent if they are not dead. Then they can be reunited with the Body to full fellowship. This is the real purpose of such discipline - to bring repentance. This is why we are instructed elsewhere to examine ourselves. We must not slip into habitual sin and most especially the public variety where we cease to care about it at all.

This is what happened for the man in question in I Corinthians 5. His return to the church is explained by Paul in the second Corinthian letter in the New Testament. Restoration. This is the goal of church discipline. It is not to forever cast out those that fail. 

II Corinthians 2:5-11

If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent—not to put it too severely. The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him. Another reason I wrote you was to see if you would stand the test and be obedient in everything. 10 Anyone you forgive, I also forgive. And what I have forgiven—if there was anything to forgive—I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, 11 in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.

The believer that does not live as a believer is the concern here. We cannot live as we once did when we were nonbelievers. The behavior and the attitudes about the behavior have to change. It does not matter which sins we are discussing. And we also need more than mere sin management. 

I Corinthians 6:9-11

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men[a] 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Our sins were forgiven at a very high cost - the life and blood of the Son of God. We must do what is required to stay within the bounds of His gracious sacrifice. The choice is ours. If we live according to the flesh, we will die in our sins. Some church discipline might just prevent that. So let's practice this discipline in the spirit of love and the grace of Jesus, holding each other accountable for the blood that set us all free. 

It will require us to be much more transparent in our lives with our brethren, but maybe that's the way it should be. We cannot help each other if we do not know each other.

What do you think?