Thursday, September 20, 2018
Romans 8
Have you ever sat down and read Romans 8. I don't mean just the last uplifting and encouraging part. I mean the whole chapter. It speaks volumes to the human condition and what it means to truly live by the Spirit of God. The meat of the chapter is really here - at least for me.
Romans 8:5-17
5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.
9 You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. 10 But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life[d] because of righteousness. 11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of[e] his Spirit who lives in you.
12 Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 13 For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.
14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,[g] Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
Is your life as a believer ruled by your flesh or by His Spirit? How do you know the flesh is ruling?
Sometimes the answer to that last question is obvious. Look in the mirror. Service to the flesh may be apparent. Do you eat so much that you look like a weeble? Do you work out so much that you can't pass a mirror without checking yourself out? Do you constantly worry about what people think of you or your personal appearance or how you choose to live? Do you spend too much on clothes?
Or maybe when you glance into the spiritual mirror of the scriptures, you are horrified by what you see there. Do you look anything like Jesus? Does the mind dwell less on the heavenly and more on the physical and earthly things of this present world? There is beauty in God's creation that be perverted to many different uses. Our senses can deceive us. Our corrupted physical natures can get us in trouble.
We need to live by His Spirit and sift out the sin in our lives while enjoying in moderation the things that make life enjoyable. Test these things. See if they are good and enjoy your salvation in the here and now. As to those things we find in our lives that pull us down into fleshly realm of distortion and abuse, we have to reject these thing, resist them and move on.
The writer of Hebrews said, " In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood."
He was right. Let's rid ourselves of the sin in our lives and let God speak truth to our souls that we may live for Him. Life will be better.
Romans 8:5-17
5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.
9 You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. 10 But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life[d] because of righteousness. 11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of[e] his Spirit who lives in you.
12 Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 13 For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.
14 For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. 15 The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.[f] And by him we cry, “Abba,[g] Father.” 16 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. 17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.
Is your life as a believer ruled by your flesh or by His Spirit? How do you know the flesh is ruling?
Sometimes the answer to that last question is obvious. Look in the mirror. Service to the flesh may be apparent. Do you eat so much that you look like a weeble? Do you work out so much that you can't pass a mirror without checking yourself out? Do you constantly worry about what people think of you or your personal appearance or how you choose to live? Do you spend too much on clothes?
Or maybe when you glance into the spiritual mirror of the scriptures, you are horrified by what you see there. Do you look anything like Jesus? Does the mind dwell less on the heavenly and more on the physical and earthly things of this present world? There is beauty in God's creation that be perverted to many different uses. Our senses can deceive us. Our corrupted physical natures can get us in trouble.
We need to live by His Spirit and sift out the sin in our lives while enjoying in moderation the things that make life enjoyable. Test these things. See if they are good and enjoy your salvation in the here and now. As to those things we find in our lives that pull us down into fleshly realm of distortion and abuse, we have to reject these thing, resist them and move on.
The writer of Hebrews said, " In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood."
He was right. Let's rid ourselves of the sin in our lives and let God speak truth to our souls that we may live for Him. Life will be better.
Tuesday, September 18, 2018
61
I told someone yesterday that I remembered when my church had outhouses. They were out in back of the building and almost in the corn field. What I didn't tell him was that I also remember when my grandpa had to replenish the church baptistery with water anytime that new Christians were expected on Sunday. I think he said it took 32 milk cans of water to fill it to proper levels. In the winter, he had to warm the outside of the building's foundation with a corn cob fire to warm the water on the inside of the baptistery. It was a job to birth new Christians back then. It suppose it was better than chopping a hole in Des Moines river ice.
I've seen many things in my life that most take for granted because of the times. Today we are accustomed to seeing history take place before our very eyes, but it was a fairly new thing when I was young.
I saw President Kennedy shot. I saw his alleged assassin shot. Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy went down on TV. It was in black and white at my house. I remember the race riots of the late 1960's and the Vietnam war protests. I remember seeing men walk on the moon, wondering if it was real. Nixon resigned after a lengthy scandal in 1974 as his impeachment loomed. President Reagan took a bullet on the evening news. The personal computer was invented. After some failed starts, phones became portable; no longer plugged into a wall.These are just the highlights.
Hideous striped and plaid bell bottoms with platform shoes and quilted shirts filled my closet. I had a leisure suit, a blow drier and hair down to my shoulders. At my college graduation, I wore a powder blue suit that screamed to the world, this one in gay, but no one was listening...thankfully. I also weighed 179 lbs. That's never going to happen again.
Today we are accustomed to life changing fast. Most of the time we don't even notice. But I witnessed the acceleration. The world is now at breakneck speed. We should crash soon. It will not be a happy time. I'm hoping to miss that event.
Today I received a birthday wish from an on-line friend that said, "May Jesus draw you ever closer to Himself this coming year", to which I said, "Thanks man. That's the best birthday wish. Will I be inside or outside the body during that process?🙃"
I've seen many things in my life that most take for granted because of the times. Today we are accustomed to seeing history take place before our very eyes, but it was a fairly new thing when I was young.
I saw President Kennedy shot. I saw his alleged assassin shot. Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy went down on TV. It was in black and white at my house. I remember the race riots of the late 1960's and the Vietnam war protests. I remember seeing men walk on the moon, wondering if it was real. Nixon resigned after a lengthy scandal in 1974 as his impeachment loomed. President Reagan took a bullet on the evening news. The personal computer was invented. After some failed starts, phones became portable; no longer plugged into a wall.These are just the highlights.
Hideous striped and plaid bell bottoms with platform shoes and quilted shirts filled my closet. I had a leisure suit, a blow drier and hair down to my shoulders. At my college graduation, I wore a powder blue suit that screamed to the world, this one in gay, but no one was listening...thankfully. I also weighed 179 lbs. That's never going to happen again.
Today we are accustomed to life changing fast. Most of the time we don't even notice. But I witnessed the acceleration. The world is now at breakneck speed. We should crash soon. It will not be a happy time. I'm hoping to miss that event.
Today I received a birthday wish from an on-line friend that said, "May Jesus draw you ever closer to Himself this coming year", to which I said, "Thanks man. That's the best birthday wish. Will I be inside or outside the body during that process?🙃"
You begin to think about such things more often after 60. It does not worry me so much now as it did when I was 30. The future is certain though and I can say that with a confidence that I have never felt before. It probably won't make the evening news when I when I hear the Golden Bells, but I'm starting to look forward to it. Sunday is coming, but I have no travel plans just yet!!! I renewed my driver's license last week for 8 years. I would like to get my money's worth. I will be 69 in 2026. I never thought I would ever be that old. Let's see if it happens.
Monday, September 17, 2018
Celibacy, Chastity and the Single Christian
I had a conversation yesterday with a soon to be single, Christian person that wanted to know how to live without sex. I did not have many good answers just off the top of my head. I usually need to mull things over. I process very slowly. You would think after 38 years of living without a sex partner, I would be able to spew tons of advice, but the fact is that I have not done this by myself. I have a God that has watched over me all my life and He is bent on saving my soul whether I cooperate or not. This is no small factor. It's also easier for me because I'm not all that attractive and that seems to keep potential partners away from my door. There was a time in 1979 when I was good looking for about 20 minutes, but the danger passed quickly.
That's an exaggeration. I was actually involved with someone for about 18 months in 1978-79 While I was in college. I told God and myself when it was over that I would never do that again unless Mr Right showed up at my door. All I can say is that he must be lost because he never arrived and I did not go out looking for him.
That last bit is key to living a life without sex. There are things you do not do and places you do not go if you want to avoid the possibility of sex or even the temptation. And that would include sex with yourself....there I said it. Staying clean outwardly and physically is one thing. It might even be easy. But if you want that to happen, you may need to stay clean the inside too. If the inside is clean, the outside will just fall into line. So police your life. Stay out of bars that promote a hook up culture, stay off certain websites and away from porn and by all means, try to avoid taking matters into your own hands. Avoiding this kind of personal intimacy is important in keeping the house clean. I've heard it said that masturbation is more like a cough or a sneeze or a belch or a fart than it is a sex act. It's just a relief valve. I have said that myself in the past. I have come to believe it's a gateway 'drug'. Whatever you think about auto-eroticism, begin thinking about it in terms of a clean mind and heart and see if that changes what you think about it.
The scriptures tell us in no uncertain terms what God's intentions are for human sexuality. His design was originally for sex to take place only between people of opposite sexes in marriage. If you are not in a marriage with a member of the opposite sex, then sex is off limits. If you are a believer and you are not married or you are divorced or your attractions are messed up (like mine), and you wish to remain within the will of God and in obedience to Him, you must give it up.
So am I talking about a life of celibacy and chastity and what do those words really mean as they apply to the single person's Christian life?
My first thought is that these terms are different and mean different things. All Christians are called to practice chastity whether single or married. Chastity is the proper observance of God's commands with regard to sexuality. If you're single, it means you do not have sex at all. If you are married, it means you have sex only with your marriage partner. And everyone must practice chastity of the mind and heart. As I said earlier, a clean mind and heart makes everything else easier.
Celibacy goes beyond chastity in some ways and may actually be a spiritual gift. It is a voluntary submission to a life without sex and family and in dedication to fuller service of God and His Church. Though one may well be able to marry in the traditional sense, this ability is given up for a higher, more noble purpose. See Matthew 19:10, 11 and also I Corinthians 7.
So what about those of us that do not have this gift of celibacy? We did not volunteer for it? We did not ask for it. But because of the situations of our lives, we must live without sex to please God.
Well, if you are single, you can marry. Some think that if you are divorced, you can remarry. I'm not so sure about that - again see Matthew 19. But what if your sexual inclinations are toward the same sex? What then?
Outside of marriage to an opposite sex partner, there are no real options for God approved sex. A chaste life is required to please God. Chastity. Purity. Sexless love. That last one is tough, but it can be done.
So, keep you pants on my single friends. Mount the bull of chastity and hang on for dear life. You will need to stay on for more than 8 seconds.
That's supposed to be funny.
That's an exaggeration. I was actually involved with someone for about 18 months in 1978-79 While I was in college. I told God and myself when it was over that I would never do that again unless Mr Right showed up at my door. All I can say is that he must be lost because he never arrived and I did not go out looking for him.
That last bit is key to living a life without sex. There are things you do not do and places you do not go if you want to avoid the possibility of sex or even the temptation. And that would include sex with yourself....there I said it. Staying clean outwardly and physically is one thing. It might even be easy. But if you want that to happen, you may need to stay clean the inside too. If the inside is clean, the outside will just fall into line. So police your life. Stay out of bars that promote a hook up culture, stay off certain websites and away from porn and by all means, try to avoid taking matters into your own hands. Avoiding this kind of personal intimacy is important in keeping the house clean. I've heard it said that masturbation is more like a cough or a sneeze or a belch or a fart than it is a sex act. It's just a relief valve. I have said that myself in the past. I have come to believe it's a gateway 'drug'. Whatever you think about auto-eroticism, begin thinking about it in terms of a clean mind and heart and see if that changes what you think about it.
The scriptures tell us in no uncertain terms what God's intentions are for human sexuality. His design was originally for sex to take place only between people of opposite sexes in marriage. If you are not in a marriage with a member of the opposite sex, then sex is off limits. If you are a believer and you are not married or you are divorced or your attractions are messed up (like mine), and you wish to remain within the will of God and in obedience to Him, you must give it up.
So am I talking about a life of celibacy and chastity and what do those words really mean as they apply to the single person's Christian life?
My first thought is that these terms are different and mean different things. All Christians are called to practice chastity whether single or married. Chastity is the proper observance of God's commands with regard to sexuality. If you're single, it means you do not have sex at all. If you are married, it means you have sex only with your marriage partner. And everyone must practice chastity of the mind and heart. As I said earlier, a clean mind and heart makes everything else easier.
Celibacy goes beyond chastity in some ways and may actually be a spiritual gift. It is a voluntary submission to a life without sex and family and in dedication to fuller service of God and His Church. Though one may well be able to marry in the traditional sense, this ability is given up for a higher, more noble purpose. See Matthew 19:10, 11 and also I Corinthians 7.
So what about those of us that do not have this gift of celibacy? We did not volunteer for it? We did not ask for it. But because of the situations of our lives, we must live without sex to please God.
Well, if you are single, you can marry. Some think that if you are divorced, you can remarry. I'm not so sure about that - again see Matthew 19. But what if your sexual inclinations are toward the same sex? What then?
Outside of marriage to an opposite sex partner, there are no real options for God approved sex. A chaste life is required to please God. Chastity. Purity. Sexless love. That last one is tough, but it can be done.
So, keep you pants on my single friends. Mount the bull of chastity and hang on for dear life. You will need to stay on for more than 8 seconds.
That's supposed to be funny.
Friday, September 14, 2018
Reflections - Friends That Made A Difference
If my twenties were lived in rebellion against God, my thirties and early forties could be characterized as mostly living without Him. Perhaps it is more correct to say that I kept a considerable distance from Him. It was not that I did not believe. It had more to do with the fact that I did not believe He loved me as He did His other children. I would not even go so far as to say I felt like He tolerated me. I truly believed that because of my same sex attractions, I was an abomination in His eyes. I also thought that if I belonged to a church in those days and this became known, it would sour the relationship. I would either be marginalized or cast out. So in those days, I did not darken a church door.
Early on, I was angry about this alleged state of affairs, and as I aged, this anger smoldered into a slow hot burning sadness that I cannot describe. It was the single worst depression of my life and I think the only reason I did not harm myself was because of my friends at work and the work itself. God sometimes gives us things to do while we sit in self imposed detention. I got work.
There was also a very close friendship that got me through those times and she knows who she is. I felt fully known by her. We had been friends since our days in church youth group. She was among the first that knew I was gay.She had a gift of empathy - probably still does - that helps her to listen. She was never one to mince words either. We would also be very frank and honest with each other on most occasions and throughout our friendship and this could be good or hurt or both. I suppose it's as close as I will ever come to being married. I say this even though I lived in a different city and state at the time. We exchanged letters and frequent phone calls. We vacationed together at least a couple of times. And when I was back in our home state, we would do things together. We were not alike. The relationship was built on complimentarianism. We were at opposite ends of the political and religious spectrum, but we could still make it work. It was by far, the most challenging and rewarding relationship I had ever enjoyed in my life up to that time. She kept me thinking and kept me from stagnating and most especially when we disagreed. I always looked forward to out time together. I think we will come together again in heaven...probably not here though.
When I was finally able to move back to my home state with my job intact, we spent much time together. I lived in a city that was 20 minutes away from hers. As we both aged, our views about politics in particular, began to separate us. We went our separate ways for a time. This time without her was actually good for me. I began to search for ways to get back in touch with my Creator and I was also looking for a way to get back to my hometown which was two hours away. I would go home on weekends to visit my parents. On Sundays they went to church...and so did I. I began hearing things that bothered me. Things like 'God loves me unconditionally' and that 'He welcomes home His lost children'. In my early years in church, I don't think I understood my heavenly Father this way. My theology at the time did allow for this kind of love and forgiveness. It was as if God was tearing down my childhood belief system and replacing it with something more orthodox. As it turned out, that is exactly what was happening. Before I knew it, I was driving two hours to church every weekend. In time, I became a teacher. God used what I already knew, gave me a revised version and allowed me to share it with others. It was not long after that my job took me back home and I was back in the family of God at the same time.
Sometime in my late forties, or maybe I was in my fifties, another person showed up in my life. He came in the form of a pastor. I have always been suspicious of people that make their living that way (;^) and I was never one to trust easily, but this guy was not going to bend to my standards. He kind of insisted on being my friend. This was weird for a number of reasons. I was not in the demographic of his ministry assignment, he is 18 years younger than me and he is married with kids. He had heard somewhere that I liked to fish. He wanted to go fishing with me. I turned him down at least a couple of times. I think I did this because I had never had a straight man express so much interest in me. His appearance also presented a problem for me. He was waaaay too good looking for an SSA guy to hang with. I also surmised that he had and exaggerated sense of his own importance and since I do enjoy deflating egos (I am so funny), I finally assented to his request. We spent a day together fishing. It was the best day of my new found faith as a recovering sinner to that point in time. We became friends. To this day and even though he is not here, we are still friends. There have been disagreements (such is life with me), but I am pleased to report that our friendship is solid, though long distance, which might be what makes it work.
And I hope he will forgive me for talking about him on line... Dude...I love you. It's OK.
Whatever. I guess my point is that friendships can be pivotal in our development and even God given. These two people have had an enormous influence on my life. They helped me shatter personal and spiritual barriers in my trek back to God. I never thought I would have friends like these, but praise the Lord, I did/do.
And that brings us to now. I have two small groups of close friends. We dine regularly together. Tonight I will enjoy a few of them.
And I have another friend....God keeps sending me pastors (what's up with that?)...this one is weirder than the last one (;^)
He loved me enough to help me out of the closet in front of my church. Try that sometime. It has been one of the best things I have ever done - overall. There are still some days when I regret it, but really, it's like someone took a 1000 lb granite rock off my soul. The freedom I feel at 61 years old is like nothing I have ever experienced...and the adventure should continue for a bit longer. Thanks my friend. I love you!
So, to Friends...I recommend them. Trust someone today. Start with God and He will point you in the right direction.
Luv ya!
JB
Early on, I was angry about this alleged state of affairs, and as I aged, this anger smoldered into a slow hot burning sadness that I cannot describe. It was the single worst depression of my life and I think the only reason I did not harm myself was because of my friends at work and the work itself. God sometimes gives us things to do while we sit in self imposed detention. I got work.
There was also a very close friendship that got me through those times and she knows who she is. I felt fully known by her. We had been friends since our days in church youth group. She was among the first that knew I was gay.She had a gift of empathy - probably still does - that helps her to listen. She was never one to mince words either. We would also be very frank and honest with each other on most occasions and throughout our friendship and this could be good or hurt or both. I suppose it's as close as I will ever come to being married. I say this even though I lived in a different city and state at the time. We exchanged letters and frequent phone calls. We vacationed together at least a couple of times. And when I was back in our home state, we would do things together. We were not alike. The relationship was built on complimentarianism. We were at opposite ends of the political and religious spectrum, but we could still make it work. It was by far, the most challenging and rewarding relationship I had ever enjoyed in my life up to that time. She kept me thinking and kept me from stagnating and most especially when we disagreed. I always looked forward to out time together. I think we will come together again in heaven...probably not here though.
When I was finally able to move back to my home state with my job intact, we spent much time together. I lived in a city that was 20 minutes away from hers. As we both aged, our views about politics in particular, began to separate us. We went our separate ways for a time. This time without her was actually good for me. I began to search for ways to get back in touch with my Creator and I was also looking for a way to get back to my hometown which was two hours away. I would go home on weekends to visit my parents. On Sundays they went to church...and so did I. I began hearing things that bothered me. Things like 'God loves me unconditionally' and that 'He welcomes home His lost children'. In my early years in church, I don't think I understood my heavenly Father this way. My theology at the time did allow for this kind of love and forgiveness. It was as if God was tearing down my childhood belief system and replacing it with something more orthodox. As it turned out, that is exactly what was happening. Before I knew it, I was driving two hours to church every weekend. In time, I became a teacher. God used what I already knew, gave me a revised version and allowed me to share it with others. It was not long after that my job took me back home and I was back in the family of God at the same time.
Sometime in my late forties, or maybe I was in my fifties, another person showed up in my life. He came in the form of a pastor. I have always been suspicious of people that make their living that way (;^) and I was never one to trust easily, but this guy was not going to bend to my standards. He kind of insisted on being my friend. This was weird for a number of reasons. I was not in the demographic of his ministry assignment, he is 18 years younger than me and he is married with kids. He had heard somewhere that I liked to fish. He wanted to go fishing with me. I turned him down at least a couple of times. I think I did this because I had never had a straight man express so much interest in me. His appearance also presented a problem for me. He was waaaay too good looking for an SSA guy to hang with. I also surmised that he had and exaggerated sense of his own importance and since I do enjoy deflating egos (I am so funny), I finally assented to his request. We spent a day together fishing. It was the best day of my new found faith as a recovering sinner to that point in time. We became friends. To this day and even though he is not here, we are still friends. There have been disagreements (such is life with me), but I am pleased to report that our friendship is solid, though long distance, which might be what makes it work.
And I hope he will forgive me for talking about him on line... Dude...I love you. It's OK.
Whatever. I guess my point is that friendships can be pivotal in our development and even God given. These two people have had an enormous influence on my life. They helped me shatter personal and spiritual barriers in my trek back to God. I never thought I would have friends like these, but praise the Lord, I did/do.
And that brings us to now. I have two small groups of close friends. We dine regularly together. Tonight I will enjoy a few of them.
And I have another friend....God keeps sending me pastors (what's up with that?)...this one is weirder than the last one (;^)
He loved me enough to help me out of the closet in front of my church. Try that sometime. It has been one of the best things I have ever done - overall. There are still some days when I regret it, but really, it's like someone took a 1000 lb granite rock off my soul. The freedom I feel at 61 years old is like nothing I have ever experienced...and the adventure should continue for a bit longer. Thanks my friend. I love you!
So, to Friends...I recommend them. Trust someone today. Start with God and He will point you in the right direction.
Luv ya!
JB
Tuesday, September 11, 2018
A Gay Christian Reading List
I know. More gay stuff. Do I ever get tired of talking about it? Well, actually, no. I am obsessed with educating people about this particular issue. Christian people need to know that it's possible to be same sex attracted and also a child of God. Christians need to know how to deal with their gay friends and family members just as Jesus does. Christians need know what it's like to grow up gay in the church. All of the things and more are included in the reading list below. I would encourage you to seek out copies of these books and learn to love and empathize with my people. Most of these are available on Amazon except where otherwise noted.
1. "Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones" - Click on the title to find this one. This is an excellent primer for families and friends to reference. If you go to my church (you know who you are), it is available at Home Pointe for free and as long as supplies last. I may also be able to help you find a free copy.
9. “Struggle
Central: Quarter-Life Confessions of a Messed Up Christian” By Thomas Mark
Zuniga
This is by no means an exhaustive list. There are other publications available, but these I would recommend as a good start. Happy reading.
1. "Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones" - Click on the title to find this one. This is an excellent primer for families and friends to reference. If you go to my church (you know who you are), it is available at Home Pointe for free and as long as supplies last. I may also be able to help you find a free copy.
2. “Messy Grace”
by Caleb Kaltenbach
3. “Washed and
Waiting” by Wesley Hill
4. “Single, Gay,
Christian: A Personal Journey of Faith and Sexual Identity” by Gregory Coles
5. “All But
Invisible” by Nate Collins
6. “A Bigger
World Yet: Faith, Brotherhood and Same Sex Needs” by Tim Timmerman
7. “People to be
Loved: Why Homosexuality Is Not Just an Issue” by Dr. Preston Sprinkle
8. “Understanding
Gender Dysphoria” by Mark Yarhouse
This is by no means an exhaustive list. There are other publications available, but these I would recommend as a good start. Happy reading.
Saturday, September 8, 2018
Is It Possible To Be A Gay Christian?
It's an interesting question. It's interesting because it seems to be in contravention to what we learn in the New Testament about who we all are in Christ. If we have truly repented and died to our sinful past, if we are trying to enjoy the increasing sanctification of our spirits in denial and mortification of fleshly desire (sin in the body) why would anyone label themselves in such a fashion?
I think the key word in that last question is the word, "label".
There is a subtle, but important difference, between a label and a life experience. Same sex attracted people experience life through a different lens than most everyone else. Christians that experience same sex attraction understand this immediately and for us, it can shape our path toward sanctification, our relationship with God and our relationship with each other up to and including our relationships with straight same sex Christians.
So, I think the other key word here is "experience". One of humanity's most primal drives is sex. We know from Jesus, the apostles and the prophets that God's view of human sexuality gives only one approved option for sexual expression - marriage between one man and one woman for life. Anything else is sexual immorality and is roundly condemned in scripture.
Having said that, we have to ask, what if you experience the drive toward sex in a different way? What if the flesh is bent in such a way that the God approved expression of human sexuality is not possible? Christians that experience this are left with few options. We can enter into marriage with someone of the opposite sex with the hope that God can help us redeem same sex desires through partnership with a heterosexual or we can choose celibacy. Both paths can be difficult and fraught with potential pitfalls and, were it not for God working through his Holy Spirit in our lives, no Christian dealing with same sex attraction would be able to stand. Praise the Lord for his mighty hand and work in our lives.
All of this is to say that when you hear someone call themselves a gay Christian or a same sex attracted Christian, it does not mean we are labeling ourselves. It is instead, a description of our particular spiritual experience as we move toward more and more sanctification. Dealing with this experience has taken me a lifetime. Please do not discount it if you hear me call myself gay or same sex attracted. I mean, how else would you know my life experience as a Christian? How would you know what I have to deal with on a daily basis in the spiritual sense? I hope that's important to you as a believer.
Do you see what I'm getting at? I hope so. It is not a good time in the Christian world to get hung up on labels. We need to come together to fight our common enemy. Satan hates all of us and the brokenness of human sexuality in general has been a major wedge he has successfully driven in to the lives of otherwise spiritually healthy believers. We cannot let this happen anymore. Divorce and sexual immorality in our culture is a major problem and it has infected God's church to such a degree that younger generations are rejecting the faith as just another version of the same culture they live in, but with hypocrisy. We have to take a united stand against sin within the church and especially sexual sin because it is of the body; the same body where God's Holy Spirit dwells. We can do this by supporting each other and NOT quibbling over labels.
I think the key word in that last question is the word, "label".
There is a subtle, but important difference, between a label and a life experience. Same sex attracted people experience life through a different lens than most everyone else. Christians that experience same sex attraction understand this immediately and for us, it can shape our path toward sanctification, our relationship with God and our relationship with each other up to and including our relationships with straight same sex Christians.
So, I think the other key word here is "experience". One of humanity's most primal drives is sex. We know from Jesus, the apostles and the prophets that God's view of human sexuality gives only one approved option for sexual expression - marriage between one man and one woman for life. Anything else is sexual immorality and is roundly condemned in scripture.
Having said that, we have to ask, what if you experience the drive toward sex in a different way? What if the flesh is bent in such a way that the God approved expression of human sexuality is not possible? Christians that experience this are left with few options. We can enter into marriage with someone of the opposite sex with the hope that God can help us redeem same sex desires through partnership with a heterosexual or we can choose celibacy. Both paths can be difficult and fraught with potential pitfalls and, were it not for God working through his Holy Spirit in our lives, no Christian dealing with same sex attraction would be able to stand. Praise the Lord for his mighty hand and work in our lives.
All of this is to say that when you hear someone call themselves a gay Christian or a same sex attracted Christian, it does not mean we are labeling ourselves. It is instead, a description of our particular spiritual experience as we move toward more and more sanctification. Dealing with this experience has taken me a lifetime. Please do not discount it if you hear me call myself gay or same sex attracted. I mean, how else would you know my life experience as a Christian? How would you know what I have to deal with on a daily basis in the spiritual sense? I hope that's important to you as a believer.
Do you see what I'm getting at? I hope so. It is not a good time in the Christian world to get hung up on labels. We need to come together to fight our common enemy. Satan hates all of us and the brokenness of human sexuality in general has been a major wedge he has successfully driven in to the lives of otherwise spiritually healthy believers. We cannot let this happen anymore. Divorce and sexual immorality in our culture is a major problem and it has infected God's church to such a degree that younger generations are rejecting the faith as just another version of the same culture they live in, but with hypocrisy. We have to take a united stand against sin within the church and especially sexual sin because it is of the body; the same body where God's Holy Spirit dwells. We can do this by supporting each other and NOT quibbling over labels.
Thursday, September 6, 2018
What Did You Have For Lunch?
I Joined A Secret Club
I joined a secret club today. As a conspiracy theorist, you would think I would be ashamed of my hypocrisy. Secret societies are allegedly responsible for the downfall of western Christian civilization. The Freemasons, Skull and Bones, the Illuminati, the Club of Rome, the Ku Klux Klan and the Bohemian Club are just a few of the fraternal orders that seek to control the levers of power in public and religious institutions and government.
But the group I joined is not like these. It is, shall we say, a para-Christian fraternal order of celibate, same sex attracted brothers in Christ that have come together to support each other. Though I am not fully initiated in rites of this organization as yet, I believe what I will find is a group of men gathered in the name of Jesus to serve Him and each others. At least I hope that's where this is going. We will see.
Some of you that know me are already seeing potential problems here since I don't always socialize well. I like to argue. I enjoy humor that is at another's expense - sarcasm, irony, pathos - the list goes on. I enjoy crushing the traditions of others and tend to be intolerant of people that disagree with me...which is really everybody when I think about it. It's a wonder I have friends at all, but I digress. It makes you wonder how I even got into a church.
I'm kidding...mostly.
So why did I join this group? It's a logical question. I was thinking the other day that all of my close friends are straight with only a couple of exceptions that come to mind. These two are special to me, but they never seem to want to talk about the struggle. If they don't want to, I have respect that. It can be difficult to be in the closet and also express what you are feeling about SSA life with another person. I was in that situation for decades and I could not take it anymore. I had to come out. I needed to talk. And I might also add that my church has been very supportive and I appreciate that more than they will ever know. It's just that I need a group of friends that get me. I need to be with my people to a certain extent. I hate being the only one in the room. Sure, I'm a white guy and I blend in well, but now that everyone knows, I have become a minority within a minority. I imagine them seeing a little rainbow over my head amongst everyone else's halos, every time they look at me.
What I really want is a group of people like me at church. I'm sure those words just made my pastors and elders cringe if they are reading. But we need it. And more broadly, we need to minister to all the singles at church without pushing them toward marriage. If we want to marry, and God supports the idea, we will find a way so quit pushing please. It is not necessarily the Christian answer to all things sexual - maybe for you, but not for everyone. (see how tolerant I'm becoming)
So wish me the best on this adventure in which I endeavor to be part of a group. It may just kill me or be the best thing yet.
But the group I joined is not like these. It is, shall we say, a para-Christian fraternal order of celibate, same sex attracted brothers in Christ that have come together to support each other. Though I am not fully initiated in rites of this organization as yet, I believe what I will find is a group of men gathered in the name of Jesus to serve Him and each others. At least I hope that's where this is going. We will see.
Some of you that know me are already seeing potential problems here since I don't always socialize well. I like to argue. I enjoy humor that is at another's expense - sarcasm, irony, pathos - the list goes on. I enjoy crushing the traditions of others and tend to be intolerant of people that disagree with me...which is really everybody when I think about it. It's a wonder I have friends at all, but I digress. It makes you wonder how I even got into a church.
I'm kidding...mostly.
So why did I join this group? It's a logical question. I was thinking the other day that all of my close friends are straight with only a couple of exceptions that come to mind. These two are special to me, but they never seem to want to talk about the struggle. If they don't want to, I have respect that. It can be difficult to be in the closet and also express what you are feeling about SSA life with another person. I was in that situation for decades and I could not take it anymore. I had to come out. I needed to talk. And I might also add that my church has been very supportive and I appreciate that more than they will ever know. It's just that I need a group of friends that get me. I need to be with my people to a certain extent. I hate being the only one in the room. Sure, I'm a white guy and I blend in well, but now that everyone knows, I have become a minority within a minority. I imagine them seeing a little rainbow over my head amongst everyone else's halos, every time they look at me.
What I really want is a group of people like me at church. I'm sure those words just made my pastors and elders cringe if they are reading. But we need it. And more broadly, we need to minister to all the singles at church without pushing them toward marriage. If we want to marry, and God supports the idea, we will find a way so quit pushing please. It is not necessarily the Christian answer to all things sexual - maybe for you, but not for everyone. (see how tolerant I'm becoming)
So wish me the best on this adventure in which I endeavor to be part of a group. It may just kill me or be the best thing yet.
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